


Stay with Me Tonight

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Alcohol, Car Chases, Closeted Character, Coming Out, Die Antwoord - Freeform, Drug Use, Drugs Made Them Do It, Eventual Romance, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Hallucinogens, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Making Out, Marijuana, Party, Pastel Dan Howell, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Slow Burn, Sneaking Out, Violence, breaking curfew, inspired vaguely by Banana Brain music video, one night
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2018-06-24
Packaged: 2019-02-22 23:04:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 31,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13177089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Phil thinks he is in love with Marzia, so he goes to a party to woo her.Dan doesn't know what he thinks, so he attends the party to keep an eye on Phil.Is it even possible to save a life, drop acid, get in a car chase, adopt a kitten, steal an heirloom, win a drinking game, get the girl, lose the girl, jump off a roof, wear pastel clothing, and fall in love with your best friend in one night?





	1. You Owe Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't forget to leave a comment. 
> 
> If any of the characters irl see this (they won't) I apologize. Additionally these characters are based on online personas, as I don't know any of these people in real life.
> 
> Find me on tumblr @princessofship

Phil had a secret. A huge secret. And there was no way he was letting Dan find out.

“Come on, Philly, please,” begged Dan, leaning across his friend to reach for the phone. Phil laughed, and rolled onto his side, practically falling off the seat and into the aisle of the school bus. Beside them, a few girls glanced over and rolled their eyes, presumably at their childishness. Dan practically crawled atop Phil to reach for the phone, unceremoniously kneeing his friend in the side. Nevertheless, Phil stretched his arm out at far away from his best friend as he possible until the phone dropped out of his hand.

“No!” yelled Phil, and when the bus took a turn, the phone went sliding right beneath them. Scrambling to grab the phone, Phil was too slow, and in a flash Dan was thumbing through the tabs to find his secret.

“Office fanfiction? Oh my gosh Phil, that show has been over for years now,” scoffed Dan. He tossed the phone back onto Phil’s lap, and Phil shot him an icy glare.

“That’s exactly why I didn’t want you to see, mister. You’re always so judgy of my fandoms,” grumbled Phil “And besides, I just binge watched the show on Netflix. Although I am disappointed there isn’t a lot of my favorite ship.”

“Which is who?” asked Dan, raising an eyebrow. At this, Phil let out a sardonic laugh, and promptly began closing tabs on his Jim/Ryan fanfics.

“Like I’m telling you.”

The bus jostled as it entered onto the cobblestone streets of Old Town. Dan turned his attention to the window, watching as the pastel colored houses with widow’s peaks rushed by in a carousel blur. The houses began to thin as the bus trucked along to the outskirts of town. It was always a sight to see, the way the ocean seemed to glimmer and peak just the slightest over the ridge and between the pine trees. The whole subdivision reeked of old money. Dan and Phil lived beyond it in the second-to-last bus stop out near the cornfields, both residing in a small cul-de-sac next to a bank and one bar, a small little outcropping about ten minutes from town and twenty from the nearest high school.

Looking at the houses always made Dan depressed. It wasn’t jealousy, or anything like that. There were many things wrong with this subdivision. First of all, that’s where Marzia lived. She was Phil’s crush. She was perfect too. Originally from Italy, she had this adorable little accent, and like Dan and Phil, was obsessed with Japanese culture. She also spoke several languages and liked to bake and was vegan and always dressed cute, and overall, she was any guy’s dream. More specifically, she was Phil’s dream. While Dan insisted to himself that he was only upset at the prospect of losing his best friend to a girl, there were other reasons the subdivision made him so sad. That asshole Jake Paul lived there too. He was the king of school, and he and his brother never failed to always have an insult on hand anytime Phil was just being _Phil_. It wasn’t the kind of outright bullying from 80’s movies, with physical violence or swirlies or anything. But those assholes always had a quip, and often liked to make Phil the butt of a joke as he got on and off the bus. They teased Dan too, but often said that Dan was “more chill” than Phil, and hence, better in their eyes. Dan didn’t care. He wanted them to leave his best friend alone.

“Oh, Dan, I forgot to tell you. How did I forget to tell you? Oh my gosh, I have huge news!” at this, Phil’s eyes lit up and he practically began bouncing in his seat. Nearby, Dan could hear Jake mumble something to his brother and laugh. Without bothering to look their way, Dan placed a careful hand on his best friend’s shoulder to calm him.

“Geez, geez, what? What is it?” asked Dan. The bus lurched to a stop, and both boys quieted as the two Paul brothers, Marzia, and a few others got off. Phil eyes immediately found Marzia, watching as she stood up in the front and waved goodbye to her friends. She was a wearing a mustard yellow cable knit sweater, a floral pattern dress, knee highs, and circle glasses, her hair done up in a stylish messy bun. For a moment, her eyes met Phil’s, and she smiled. Phil practically swooned.

Meanwhile, Dan was trying to make eye contact with someone else—Jake. As Jake loudly yelled at friends as he lumbered off the bus, Dan made sure to shoot him an icy glare, which was met with a sarcastically thrown kiss on Jake’s part. Dan rolled his eyes to show his displeasure at Jake’s teasing.

“Okay,” said Phil as the bus began moving again, snapping from his Marzia-induced haze “I heard through the grapevine that Jake is throwing a major party tonight. And Marzia is going to be there! We have to sneak in Dan, this might be my only chance to talk to her.” Dan sighed and sunk into his seat. Parties were not his thing, especially when they were thrown by Jake Paul of all people.

“I would say yes, but the Paul brothers? Seriously? I don’t know if we should waste our time. Why can’t you talk to her on the bus like a normal person?” Dan already knew the answer to that question, but he knew that he had to at least put up a minimal fight. Pretty much anything else sounded like a better Friday night than a Jake Paul party. Anything. But he also knew that Phil, as per usual, could pretty easily also get Dan to leave the house, no matter what. It didn’t hurt that Phil was Dan’s only real friend. Or that his blue eyes were…. Something when he pulled a puppy dog face….

“I know, I know, but hear me out. This party is supposed to be giant—huge—the Paul’s parents are out of town the whole weekend and there’s supposed to be a shit ton of alcohol and—”

“And this is supposed to convince me?” said Dan, dubiously. At this, Phil began to pull a long face, fluttering his eyelashes prettily.

“I thought you said you liked getting secretly drunk?” asked Phil.

“Yeah, with you—with friends, in my basement. Not with a bunch of losers from school in some yuppie rich person house,” countered Dan. Phil, of course, noticed the correction.

“You _will_ be with me though. And, hopefully, also Marzia, and you told me you thought she was cool too,” said Phil. Dan kept his comment to himself, thinking _I said she was **pretty** , not cool. _

“Phil, I don’t think you’re thinking this all the way through. What if we run into Jake? If he sees us crashing his cool kid party, we will definitely be kicked out. Then you’ll never have a chance with Marzia,” said Dan. The more he spoke, the more Dan realized that that could possibly be a good thing, although he didn’t want to admit that. Also seeing the Paul house could be kind of cool, even if it was just to roast it later on with Phil. Plus, he could possibly steal a few beers for later. Despite the fact it sounded like a terrible evening, it could be worth it in the long run.

“We won’t, the whole school is practically supposed to be there. Hell, Jake will probably have his hands full trying to keep the cops away and his house from being torn apart. There is no way we will run into him,” said Phil.

At this point, the bus was nearing on their subdivision, and Dan was running out of excuses not to go. Overall, it sounded like a terrible idea, but Dan also knew that Phil would never let him hear the end of it if they didn’t go. Besides, Dan had never been to a real party before, especially not a rager like this one sounded like it was going to be. There was _some_ potential for this to be fun.

Glancing over, Dan saw Phil making his eyes as wide as possible, and once again bouncing in his seat as he excitedly waited for Dan to reply. Kiddish behavior aside, Phil really did seem eager to go to this party. Dan gave a long, exaggerated sigh, and ran a hand through his curly hair. The bus came to a halt, and both boys stood and slung their backpacks over their shoulders. As they exited the bus, Dan stopped and turned to look at Phil, who was trotting behind him.

“Fine, we can go. But you _owe_ me.”

Little did Dan know, truer words had never been spoken.

 

         


	2. Pastel

Phil and Dan did the usual routine of video games and dinner with Dan’s family as to not raise suspicion. When Phil left early, at about seven, mumbling some excuse about homework despite the fact it was a Friday, Dan’s parents still didn’t question it. Soon the lights were being turned off and everyone was to bed by 9 o’clock sharp. Typical middle class family unit stuff.

Dan stood in his mirror and judged his reflection by the light of his phone. He hadn’t wanted to turn the lights on in fear of alerting his parents to his night time activities. It was nearing 10 o’clock now. Dan still was incredibly unsure of what he was wearing.

See, Dan had been going through a little phase on Tumblr. Like most angsty teens his age, Tumblr was one of his main sources of entertainment, so he often perused the popular tags and trends. One of those trends were soft grunge or “pastel aesthetic.” It was silly, but Dan couldn’t help but feel absolutely enchanted by the edgy messages superimposed atop pictures of pastel pink sunsets, strawberry milk, vintage cartoons, you name it. The style aspect of this aesthetic was more aimed at girls, but this didn’t stop Dan from using some Christmas money to order an oversized sweater from Amazon as well as a flower crown. In all honesty, he really didn’t think gender roles mattered that much in the grand scheme of things. In an entire wardrobe of black, the crewneck sweater stood out, so Dan had kept it hidden at the very bottom of his closet. The sweater was simple. A soft ballet pink, the main feature was the words _all the stars are dead_ printed across the front in lowercase white letters. It was the kind of print one had to be close to see, but complimented the pale white flower crown perfectly. While it was not his nature to necessary be subtle, the crown of flowers were, each little bud of white daisy deftly woven into a thicket of curly brown hair. Still, in the dark, all Dan had to do was press a small button behind his ear, and the flowers each began to emit a soft glow. Perfect for a party. All of this was paired alongside Dan’s only pair of light wash skinny jeans, as well as his white converse that were scuffed from years of use.

Examining his outfit in the mirror of his bedroom, Dan moaned softly in agony. He _wanted_ to wear his nicest clothes—he wanted to introduce his best friend, and the world, to his secret style. Yet his anxiety was seeming to win out. First of all, this was his first party, so it was quite possible that taking a risk wouldn’t be the best idea. On top of that, a lot of the popular kids, including Jake, constantly ragged on him for looking, acting, or seeming gay, especially when he was with Phil, and for this party, Dan was not really planning on leaving Phil’s side. But what other occasion would he get to wear his new clothes? He could at least pretend to forget the outfit later on, saying he was too drunk to remember if anyone brought it up.

In the middle of his deliberation, though, Dan’s phone buzzed with a  text from Phil, shaking his only source of light against the mirror. The text read _are you almost ready? I’m in the garden._

Panicked that he was running out of time, Dan yanked off the flower crown and the sweater. Going to his closet, he threw on a plain black tee. As he headed out the door in a flurry, he paused momentarily to stare at the sweater. It looked like a deflated party balloon just lying on the floor like that. Impulsively, Dan grabbed the sweater as he rushed out the door, pulling it over his head as he passed his parents’ room.

* * *

 

When he got outside into the backyard, he found Phil sitting on the little stone bench next to his mother’s flower garden. One of the main features of Dan’s backyard was the impressive willow tree overlooking his mother’s amateur garden filled with bunches of gardenias. Phil was hidden behind the hanging leaves, but his face was aglow as he texted on his phone in the moonlight. Taking a deep breath for courage, Dan approached his best friend, pulling the sweater sleeves over his hands nervously.

“There you are,” whispered Phil as he heard leaves crunching toward him “I never thought—oh. I’ve never seen that sweater before.”

Phil stood and pushed aside the branches, squinting in the dark to get a better look at Dan’s sweater. Feeling a blush that hopefully didn’t show in the moonlight, Dan looked down shyly at his messy white shoes.

“It’s an aesthetic thing I—is it too much? Because I have a shirt on underneath and I could totally ditch the—”

“What does it say? I can’t read it in this light,” muttered Phil. At this, Dan smiled. His dimple showed as he was being simultaneously bashful and cheeky.

“ _All the stars are dying_ ,” quoted Dan. At this, Phil chuckled, straightening up.

“Sounds very Dan. I never knew you owned anything of color though,” said Phil. For some reason, Phil reached up and ran a finger across the text, feeling the glossy printing as he spoke.

This did things to Dan. In fact, a lot of Phil’s touches had been doing things to Dan lately. Particularly the unpredictable kind like this, the kind that snuck up on him and gripped his body in a way he didn’t know was possible from a friendly touch. He was likely just being hormonal. Likewise, he had to take a step back before responding to his friend. His brain felt like the flurry of moths throwing themselves against his neighbor’s porchlight—trying desperately to get somewhere yet fluttering about in a panicked swarm.

“So you don’t think it’s too much?” asked Dan. Phil let his hand drop, shoving it into his pocket and offering his best friend a grin.

“No, I think it’s great. I was just surprised to see you in pink. It looks cute,” Dan forgot how to breathe for a second “How do I look?”

How did Phil look? He wore a typical navy blue button up buttoned all the way to the top around his neck. Little foxes alternating orange and white dotted the shirt, creating a playful but relaxed print. He wore a tight pair of kahkis, the kind that did not at all suggest anything dad-ish but rather a preppy businessman-vibe, and they were rolled up to reveal a pair of boat shoes to finish the preppy yet geeky look. His pale skin had visible goosebumps in the fall air.

How did Phil look to Dan? Absolutely handsome, quirky, and charming. How did Phil look to the rest of the world?

“Fine. You might want to unbutton your collar though,” said Dan. With a nod, Phil began to struggle with the top button of his shirt, and Dan had to bite his lip to avoid offering help.

Now that they were ready, the actual thrill of the situation finally hit Dan. He was sneaking away to a party like a normal teenager for once! His heart began to thud underneath his new clothes, and despite the chill of the night, he felt sweat began to prick up under his armpits. Shifting his face to the side to sniff his armpit, Dan found he just smelled like Axe. Carefully, he rolled the sleeves up to his elbows, embracing the chill of the night as another shockwave of thrill ran through his body. It was palpable that Phil felt the same as he led them both toward the fence. The both took a turn hopping the fence, because the latch squeaked when opened, and then set off down the suburban street into the night.

Challenge number one: the town had a teen curfew that began in half an hour. Phil informed Dan the walk would be about that long, so they had to be hasty. Lucky for them, half that walk was cornfields, so the chances of being caught, regardless of timing, were slim to none. As they walked, they talked, and Dan soon found himself relaxing. He was with Phil and he thought that as long as he had his best friend by his side, nothing could go wrong.

* * *

 

“That’s the thing,” said Phil “I really don’t know what I’m doing after all this. I mean, next year is our senior year and I have no clue what I want to do. I really like making videos and playing around with my mom’s camera. But that’s not a _career_. Maybe linguistics. I’m not sure.” They were in a conversation as deep as the night, as tended to happen when they didn’t have video games or phones to distract them. Both looked off ahead of them, twenty minutes into the walk at this point, and the high was wearing off as they stretched their gangly teenage legs. Dan risked a look at Phil and found that his best friend’s cheeks were tinted pink in the pale light of the street lamps, either from the chill of the fall air or the effort from walking. Maybe both.

“I don’t know either, Phil. My parents think I should go to law school, so I’ll probably study English or Polysci to start… still I don’t know if that’s me,” said Dan. At this, Phil turned to look at him, giving one of his signature cheery grins.

“You’d be good at that. You’d been good at anything you set your mind to,” said Phil. Dan didn’t reply with anything but a shrug.

“I mean….” Dan started, trailing off. There was a comfortable silence as Phil, ever dutiful, gave Dan a moment to gather his thoughts. When the silence stretched on, he supplied a comforting arm slung around Dan’s shoulder, much like they used to do in middle school, back when they weren’t as berated for being touchy-feely.

“What about the piano? You’re pretty good at that if I remember correctly,” said Phil. If Dan’s heart wasn’t already fluttering from the physical contact, it was thumping into hyperdrive at that statement. No one had known about the piano other than Phil. After the disaster with his piano teacher in gradeschool, Dan had told his friends and family he was done with music. Yet, once high school hit, Dan started using the practice rooms near the band hallway during study hall. He didn’t think he was very good, so he didn’t talk about it. One day, though, he found himself casually mentioning it to Phil, who then asked quite enthusiastically to listen to him play. Dan couldn’t say no to him. Since then, Phil and Dan would meet up nearly every study hall in the band hallway. Phil would silently work on homework in the corner as Dan practiced songs that usually only little kids would play.

“Not that good, I’m self taught, and that can only go so far,” admonished Dan.

“Yeah, well, that’s why you’d go to school for it. They’ll teach you stuff, yeah?” said Phil. Dan shook his head, letting his curls fall into his eyes as he kicked a rock down the sidewalk.

“Probably not. I don’t see my parents going for it,” murmured Dan. Out of the corner of his eye, Phil frowned. Playfully, Dan kicked the rock in his direction, and soon the two were silently dribbling the rock down the sidewalk into the nicer neighborhood in town. Lawns soon turned from neat to immaculate; fences turned to gates with codes; and three year old siding shifted to the newest, trendiest paneling. Dan was enjoying the warmth of Phil’s arm on his shoulders when it was yanked away in shock.  

A gun shot rang out through the neighborhood. Both young guys, alarmed, fell to the ground in shock, Phil jumping atop Dan as the shot burrowed into a nearby stop sign. Dan lifted his head and saw a car speeding by. He recognized that car—it was distinct. With black paint and tinted windows, the car was a customized Mercedes, and the edges of the car lit in a satanic red, which only complimented the outrageous symbols in white spray paint that decorated the outside. It was Felix’s car. Felix was a cool guy—nice, friendly, all that—but he was an odd one. And a little unhinged as well. Sticking out from the car was pistol, aimed right at the stop sign, and a feminine voice squealed from within the car as well. Suddenly, the car stopped, then backed up suddenly. Dan pushed Phil off him, but the taller man clung to his shoulders and held him  back.

“What the fuck, was that a gun?!” murmured Phil in shock. When the car started reversing toward them, Phil scrambled up and grabbed his friend’s arm “Let’s get out of here, I don’t want to get shot!” His voice edged on panic as Dan stood his ground, waiting for the car to reach him.

“No, it’s just Felix fucking around. Felix, what the hell, man?!” yelled Dan as the car pulled up to them. Phil lingered behind at first, but as Dan stormed toward the car in rage he began trotting up behind. The window rolled down in full now, revealing—

“Marzia!” squeaked Phil quietly in shock. Sitting in the passenger seat was Marzia dressed in a trendy all white-ensemble. From her hot pants to his long sleeve crop top, the white complimented her olive skin beautifully. Her eyes were bold with a gold glimmer, and her lips were a soft pink. She looked downright angelic if it wasn’t for the fact she was holding a handgun.

“Oh, hi boys!” lilted Marzia in her delicate accent “I’m sorry, Felix wanted me to shoot the stop sign, so see if I could do it. I didn’t see you there!”

There was silence as both Dan and Phil took a moment to process the fact that it had been _Marzia_ who had shot the gun. Their faces must have reflected this shock, as Felix, from behind the steering wheel broke into hysterical laughter. A small smile tugged on the corner of Marzia’s pink lips and she lowered the gun to her lap.

“Hey, would you guys like a ride to the party? It’s the least we could do after scaring you like that!” she trilled out the window. Dan twisted around to shoot Phil an exhausted look, but when he turned to face his friend he found Phil in that same love-struck trance he always got into around Marzia. There was an awkward silence as the two boys continued to say nothing and Marzia made a face, as if she regretted the invitation. She hastily put the gun in the glovebox.

“Um hello, earth to DanandPhil,” said Felix, mashing their names into one word as so many in the school regularly did. It was rare enough to find one without the other, so it seemed they were quite often lumped together in speech as well. People didn’t invite Phil to things without expecting Dan; additionally, students didn’t gossip about Dan without including Phil somehow. It was like they were a package deal, which only sometimes bothered Dan and most times, delighted him in a weird way.

“Um, sure, yeah I guess,” said Dan. He could feel himself physically cringe, as one of the last things he wanted to do was get in _that_ car, the one that was anything but subtle with an unhinged driver and his best friend’s gun-slinging love interest. Still this would give Phil a chance to talk to Marzia….and that was the whole point of going to the party after all.

Silently, as if floating on air, Phil and Dan entered the car. Felix cranked up the music, blaring the Mortal Kombat Theme. Marzia squealed along with the car tires as they tore up the asphalt towards the party.

Dan’s regret levels went from normal to extreme when suddenly the car was filled up with a sudden cloud of smoke. And it didn’t smell like normal vape. It was Felix’s pen and it glowed an ominous red just like the lights decorating the exterior of the customized vehicle. He turned and offered the pen to the boys in the back.

“Have you guys pregamed yet?” asked Felix. Both shook their heads in silent “nos.” Marzia laughed and took the vape pen from Felix.

“I don’t think they do that kind of thing,” she said, yelling over the music.

“What kind of thing?” asked Dan defensively. Phil continued to stay silent, watching Marzia with wide, awe-filled blue eyes. Dan wanted to shake him out of it so he could help him figure out what the heck was going with those two, but instead he settled with just leaning his arm a little closer to his best friend’s.

Marzia opened her mouth to speak, but instead ended up letting out another feminine squeal as Felix took a drastic turn. Dan peered up at the front and noted they were going nearly 50 miles an hour in a 20 mile per hour zone.

“Smoke. Why, do you want some?” she asked, holding the pen out to Dan. Dan examined her, noticed that her pupils were indeed dilated. Unfortunately it only succeeded in making her look more innocent and doe-like. Dan really didn’t want to smoke whatever they smoking, but he assumed it was just weed. What harm would it do? In fact, it could help him relax a little, maybe get into the “party mood” or whatever. Also, it was better than sitting next to Phil, shaking and all too sober in the back of Felix’s crazy car with Felix’s crazy driving.

“Yeah, I do, thanks,” said Dan, taking the pen from her. This seemed to break Phil out of his trance, as he turned to Dan blinking in shock and opening his mouth. Likewise, he closed it again as Dan, with no hesitation, took a long hit from the vape pen. He didn’t really feel anything, so he held it out to Phil. Phil looked at Marzia, but she had already turned around to change the music. The song switched from Mortal Kombat to “Daddy” by Die Antwoord. When he saw she wasn’t looking, he gave Dan a barely-there shake of his head, and Dan shrugged in return. Silently, he held up the pen to Felix, who took it with a knowing grin and placed it between his lips once again. The music was too loud at this point to talk, so Dan sat back, waiting for the drugs to hit him. To his dismay, Dan was unable to enjoy anything as blue and red lights suddenly lit up the back of the car.

“Oh shit, Felix!” yelled Marzia. Felix didn’t even give the cops a look, instead he just scoffed and pulled Marzia’s seatbelt on over her.

“Oh shit,” said Phil, speaking for the first time since they entered the car. Dan turned and saw an angry looking police officer tailing them. They were in a car with drugs, a gun, and four teenagers high and out past curfew. Dan nearly threw up.

“Don’t worry guys I’ll shake him,” said Felix, sounding way too chill considering the situation. Marzia let out a grown of dismay and hit her hand against the back of her car seat.

“Felix, not _this_ shit again,” she moaned. Dan and Phil met each other’s eyes, both mirroring the other’s panic.

“What do you mean you’ll _shake_ him?” asked Dan. Felix’s only response was speeding up, the car hitching up to 70 miles an hour.

“Hold on bros!” yelled Felix. Dan’s heart began to pick up again, even worse than when he first escaped the house with Phil.

It only got worse when Phil grabbed his hand.         

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter length is likely to continue being inconsistent as I'm ending at plot points, not word count. Please leave a comment, it really helps me have encouragement to write!


	3. Banana Brain

The car whizzed past the subdivisions onto another winding road cutting through a corn field. Behind them, the cop sped up, the front bumper nearly hitting the back of Felix’s. Letting out a crazed laugh, Felix turned up the dubstep music to drown out the noise coming from the speaker of the cop car.

“Pull over,” buzzed the speaker. They continued, but no one in the car could hear them, although Dan distinctly heard the word “felony” somewhere in the cop’s orders.

In the back of the car, both Dan and Phil were plastered to their seats, unable to move, speak, or think. Well, Dan was thinking—his mind was racing with two distinct worries: the first being a calculation on how to get out of the immense amounts of trouble he was surely in, and the second was focused on Phil’s hand holding his. Dan squeezed his eyes shut, drowning out the image of Felix gripping the steering wheel tighter as he sped up to 90 mph, and Marzia excitedly, almost giddily, turning her head back and forth from the cop car trailing. When he closed his eyes, he could still hear the wail of the police siren, the excitedly yelling from Felix, and the giddy shrieks from Marzia, but he also could focus more on Phil holding his hand.

Phil’s hand was as predicted—clammy and shaky. But his fingers were long (much more typical of a piano player’s fingers than Dan’s short nubs) and his hand was bigger than Dan’s, so there was something nice about holding it. It made Dan feel grounded and safe. Beside him, he heard Phil muttered curse words quietly under his breath as the car swerved. Something about focusing on Phil filled Dan with a sense of calm, enough that he was finally able to speak again.

Yelling over the music, Dan finally said:

“Felix, this is crazy, we can’t outrun a cop car! You are getting us in more trouble. Please just stop!”

“Don’t worry!” replied Marzia before Felix could “He’s done this a thousand times before, we got this!” While Dan was still unconvinced, he sat back in the seat and acquiesced, with a begrudged sigh. He didn’t think that would work anyway, but he had to say _something_.  Felix was too absorbed in driving to pay attention to him anyway. Turning to Phil, Dan noticed that his pale friend looked even more ghostly than usual. Their eyes met. Phil tried to smile that iconic smile of his, the one that made Dan have to look away to keep from blushing, but it only amounted to looking woobly and forced. Instead, Dan squeezed his hands, and leaned close to Phil so he could hear him over the screaming bass from the speakers. If he couldn’t stop this from happening, the least he could do was comfort his best friend.

“It’s okay, if we’re caught I’ll take all the blame. I’ll say I kidnapped you or something, made you go out past curfew,” said Dan. He was distinctly aware of how close his lips were to Phil’s ear, but he could tell that Phil wasn’t, too wrapped up in his own worry to notice anything. Still, he managed to get a real smile out of Phil with that.

“You’re way shorter than me and are wearing a pink jumper—I don’t think they’ll believe you kidnapped me,” teased Phil. Dan smiled back now, happy to hear the old Phil again.

Suddenly, and without warning, Felix made a sharp turn and slammed off the car lights—both exterior and interior—and silenced the music. He accelerated once again, then turned sharply the opposite direction, throwing Phil atop Dan in the backseat despite the fact they were both wearing their seatbelts at this point. Before they could even separate, Felix hit the breaks and leapt from the car, leaving it idling with the three inside. Dan and Phil both began to speak, each saying a separate version of “What the hell?” but Felix was back before they could finish. At this point, the cop hadn’t even rounded the second corner, and as Felix pulled foreword, Dan was able to make out the outline of the metal fence outside. After pulling through the fence, Felix got out and presumably shut it. They then sped off onto a gravel road. Once a safe distance away, Felix turned back on his lights and music—this time not blaring, but rather at a normal level.

After a beat, Dan and Phil looked at each other, then at Felix and Marzia, who were both respectively smirking in their seats.

“Wow,” said Phil at last “We actually did it.”

* * *

 

When they finally arrived at the party the adrenaline high still hadn’t worn off. Feeling brazen, Dan shared another hit of the vape pen weed with Felix and Phil finally spoke to Marzia as they exited the car. They were parked down the street from the presumably giant house of the Paul brothers and walked up hill into the nicest subdivision in town.

“So…. You seemed to have pretty good aim with that stop sign,” said Phil awkwardly. Dan watched Phil as he tried to shove his hands into his front jean pockets, then ended up actually missing a pocket, letting his hand flop lamely to his side. It would have been funny if Dan hadn’t felt that flare of jealousy at the sight of Phil’s awkward flirting. With a sigh, Dan took the pen from Felix and took another hit, letting the smoke linger in his mouth for a moment before letting it out. The effect of the pot hadn’t hit him yet, but Dan couldn’t be sure since he hadn’t smoked before. When he handed the pen back to Felix, he didn’t meet the older guy’s eyes, but from the corner of his vision Dan saw him nod approvingly.

“You think? I’ve only ever shot a gun once before that,” piped Marzia cheerily “Have you ever shot a gun before?”

“No, I can’t say I have,” Phil said. He scratched the back of his neck. The pair walked ahead of Felix and Dan, leading them up to a large gate outside what appeared to be a lavish mansion. When the four approached the scene, Dan couldn’t believe that it looked like something out of a movie.

The whole front lawn was littered with teens. As it turned out, the Paul household was rather divided from the rest of the community. A long driveway led into an outcropping of trees, enough to provide privacy from neighbors and, hopefully, buffer noise. The yard was already littered with red solo cups, and within the house the four levels of rooms were alit with rainbow lights. Music poured from speakers on the porch and vibrated the ground from within. Teens were in groups huddled around outdoor beer pong tables, smoking various substances near the treeline, or even sitting on the overhang above the door letting their feet dangle down. Peaking from behind the house was an indoor pool in what looked like a greenhouse—the condensation clouded the glass, but Dan could still make out some scantily clad bodies lit up in blue pool lights within.

High schoolers and college kids from all social groups were there. In one corner near the window on the bottom floor, Dan could make out a group of “lame” kids that Dan knew but didn’t hang out with (they were in a different subgroup of “unpopular” than Dan). Within that group was Shane Dawson and his boyfriend (Rylee? Ryland? Dan could never remember his name), along with Trisha Paytas (a drama queen, but ultimately a sweet heart, and absolute princess of the drama club) and Drew Monson (shy, sweet, and often teased for being gay). Near the beer pong table was Bryan Le, or Ricegum, as all the popular kids called him, as well as Jake’s pack of friends who liked to call themselves “Team Ten.” On the second floor sitting on the awning, Dan could make out a girl named Jenna who’d been a senior when he was a freshman. By now, she was likely in college, and she sat with her boyfriend Julien and some guy named Jack who Dan thought she hated back when they were in high school (some kind of fued about their dogs). As the group of four approached the gate, Dan saw a girl name Gabbie emerge from the front door with her friend Liza, as well as a kid named Ian who Dan remembered had called out Ricegum for teasing her earlier that year. Before that, Gabbie and Ian had not even run in the same social circles, but since then Dan had seen them talking on occasion in the hallway. Behind Ian came his friend, a guy whose nickname was “Filthy Frank.” He was known for being a tad on the crazy side, but Dan had actually liked the kid’s crazy antics that he often got up to with Ian, and their other friend Max, who were all freshman. The group waltzed past Laci Green and Chris Ray Gun—seniors and heads of two opposing poly-sci clubs at school-- who were currently making out on the front porch near a keg.

Still at the gate, Felix brazenly pulled it open, stepping aside to allow Marzia, Phil, and Dan pass through.

“So, uh, is this your first party?” asked Phil as he and Marzia made their way up the winding blacktop pathway that led to the top of the hill upon which the Paul house stood. Despite the fact Dan wanted to give his friend space to talk with Marzia in private, as they approached the house Dan sped up a bit to walk a step behind Phil. His antisocial nature was kicking in, and Dan had no problems trailing Phil like a lost puppy if that’s what it took.

“No, not at all,” laughed Marzia. It was light, not teasing. She nodded over to Felix and said “He drags me to them all the time.”

“Not all the time,” defended Felix “And only a few as big as this.” He took another hit of smoke from his pen and blew it into the air.

Dan held back from reaching foreword and grabbing Phil’s hand as they got to the main porch. Chaos seemed to break out once they got there. One moment, they were travelling as a quadruplet—next Marzia was heading off toward a pack of beautiful, squealing girls, pulling Phil with her, and Felix was making his way up to the awning to sit with Jenna and her friends, who had kicked his snapback off onto the ground. Dan heard a voice call his name right as the weed was kicking in and making him feel a bit calmer, as well as a tad light-headed. He decided to follow the voice calling his name, although a small part of his brain really wanted to go search for Phil.

The voice had come from the left side of the wrap- around porch, not too far from a second keggar. Dan followed the voice cautiously, but was relieved to see his friend PJ along with some other people he knew like Louise, Anthony, and Ian sitting in a group with about ten other people Dan didn’t really talk to. When he approached the group, Dan was greeted by his friends, then offered a cup of beer by Anthony. Of course, the first question he got was:

“Where’s Phil?” This was asked by Louise. Dan just shrugged, pretending to be nonchalant but feeling the exact opposite. In fact, despite the synthetic calm from the weed, Dan was internally starting to freak out because it had been nearly five minutes now and he still couldn’t locate Phil anywhere in the crowd off the porch. He found himself continuously peaking into the windows trying to see if he could catch a glimpse of his best friend inside the mansion.

“I don’t know. He went off with Marzia. We rode with her and Felix,” said Dan. The group broke into drunken noise. It was obvious at this point that Dan, despite being fairly high, was the most sober of the group.

“Oh my gosh, did you almost die?” asked PJ. Dan gave a smile and took a sip of his beer.

“Actually, yes. You’re not going to believe it,” said Dan. As he launched into the story and chugged a few solo cups of beer, he slowly began to stop worrying about Phil or even feeling too socially awkward. Besides, Phil was always the more responsible out of the two, there was no way he was getting himself into any real trouble, right?

* * *

 

When the room went from normal colors to what felt like inverse colors, Phil knew he was in trouble. In fact, his depth perception was slowly going off now, and he was having trouble keeping his hands straight, his face straight, could he feel his blood, why did he taste noise? Marzia wasn’t Marzia anymore—she flashed as Marzia, then she was an old man, then Marzia—what time was it? When did he end up on these stairs? How much time had passed? Phil went to grip the stairs, but felt too disassociated from his hands and missed. Marzia disappeared into the crowd with a wink.

* * *

 

_Earlier_

Phil followed Marzia like a duckling following it’s mother as she launched into the arms of a few squealing girls. He recognizes some girls named Bethany and Zoella, but doesn’t really know the others, especially not well enough to talk to them. Zoella was dressed just as aesthetically as Marzia, wearing a plain black dress with gold heels and bright red lipstick. Next to ethereal Marzia dressed in white, they looked like a perfect devil/angel duo. The group moved into the front hallway of the mansion, pausing to stand out in a lush looking entrance. It had high ceilings and two staircases on either side, leading up to what seemed an almost entire other party. People streamed up and down the stairs and into the room next door, which was dark and glowing. The girls stopped there and begin to chat about the party, who they saw, and gossip. Phil stood off awkwardly to the side before finally deciding to grab a drink. As he left, Marzia reached out and touched his arm with a well-manicured hand (her fingernails were a light ballet pink, distractingly light).

“Hey, Phil, would you mind grabbing me a drink?” she asked with a sweet smile. Phil about melted into a puddle on the floor, so he ended up just nodding instead saying anything intelligent. To his happiness, though, as he walked away he heard Zoe say:

“Oh he’s cute!” to which Marzia replies

“I know, right?” she paused “You wouldn’t believe what Felix put us through again!” As she began to recount the story, Phil smiled to himself and headed further into the party. He went around the corner, he found three rooms, each connected through an archway. The rooms were dimly lit, barring a disco ball set up in the corner. The first room was a dining room with all the furniture pushed to the sides, making room for a crowd of writhing, dancing teenagers, many of whom Phil recognized from school. The next room was a kitchen, which was lit by a jack-o-latern, glowing orange on marble countertops. This room had a keg, as well as a table with what appeared to be different types of pills and bongs on it. Phil made a beeline to that room, shouldering his way through the crowd. Once he was in the kitchen, he saw the next room was almost entirely empty, and lit only by a purplish light from outside that was peaking through the curtains over the windows. It is some type of sitting room with a couch, and it was the quietest room he had seen thus far, one of the only places not infected by the cacophony of sound coming from what sounded like several speakers. After grabbing two cups of beer, Phil headed into that room and sat on the couch. Cloaked in the darkness and quiet, he took a moment to sip on his drink and collect his thoughts before returning to the party.

Unfortunately, the beer tasted awful, and his thoughts were scattered. For one, he was beginning to worry about Dan. Phil was hoping to see his friend in the crowds, but was unable to spot him, and Phil wondered idly if he should return outside to search for him. He knew truthfully that Dan was fully capable of taking care of himself, and that if he did seek him out, he’d probably hear an earful from his best friend about leaving Marzia behind. Still, Phil felt this pull in his stomach at the idea of not seeing Dan for the rest of the night. While the main mission of the party had been to get with Marzia, Phil found himself wishing more and more that he’d pitched the idea differently. Firstly, they probably wouldn’t have ended up in Felix’s car, which would have saved them a whole lot of anxiety. But also, as Phil looked out on the dancing crowd of his peers, he couldn’t help but think about how badly he wanted Dan out there with him. They’d do silly dance moves, and maybe yell out the lyrics to “Check yes Juliet” and eventually stumble off together to the porch, drink beer, make fun of the other kids who thought they were so cool. With Marzia he couldn’t see himself doing any of that.

Phil sighed and stood up with resolve. Taking another sip of beer, he decided to push foreword with the Marzia plan. As much as he wanted to see Dan, he knew his best friend would be around for other parties in the future, but with Marzia, his only chance was tonight. As Phil began weaving through the crowd again, he found Marzia still chatting with her friends near the staircases. He found himself chugging half his cup of beer, trying to drown out that creeping, dark feeling in the pit of his stomach. It wasn’t the butterflies that Phil always read about in love poems—it was pure nervous energy and dread. Phil figured the poems just had it wrong, that those feelings were reserved for friends, and maybe once Phil was as close with Marzia as he was with Dan he’d get those delightful little butterflies.

“Hi, um, I hope beer is okay, that’s all they had,” said Phil, holding out the cup to Marzia. He stood straight like a toy solidier and his arm looked equally as wooden. Marizia smiled gracefully and took the beer.

“No, it’s great! Want to dance?” she asked, her accent lilting. Phil stood there silently for a beat too long, but as Marzia opened her mouth to ask again, he let out a stilted “Yes!”

Stepping aside, Phil let Marzia lead the way back into the open-air rooms he had just came from. She waved over her shoulder at Zoella and Bethany, who both blew kisses jokingly back before disappearing up the stairs. As they entered the dancefloor, Phil’s heart picked up and his hands began to sweat so badly he was sure he was going to drop the beer on the floor. Stupidly, all Phil could think was _Wait, I have no idea how to dance!_

Once on the floor, Marzia immediately began to take the lead. She expertly swung her hair over her shoulder, turning away from Phil sassily. Phil shuffled a bit to get back in front of her, when her hand on his thigh stopped him. She held him in place as she began to grind on him. They would have looked just like any other couple on the dancefloor, as most of them were dancing equally as confidently as Marzia in similar positions, had it not been for Phil standing there unsure what to do with his hands. When he glanced around, he noted a girl from his Biology class, Lisa Schwartz, grinding on her boyfriend similar to the way Marzia danced against him. Her partner (some college guy) placed a hand on her waist and rocked along with her. Phil considered doing that, but he just didn’t feel comfortable putting his hand on Marzia’s waist, which seemed ridiculous as she pressed herself against him and continued to touch his thigh. As she danced for an awkward minute, Phil chugged the rest of his beer, then squeezed his eyes shut. He wasn’t drunk, but he was beginning to feel the effects of the alcohol on his empty stomach. Plus his sweat had gone from a nervous drip down his back to soaking through his shirt, as the dance floor was arguably the hottest part of the whole house.

Marzia turned around and said something, shaking her head and her eyebrows coming together.

“What? Sorry I can’t hear you,” said Phil lamely. The longer they were out there, the more Phil was regretting coming to this party in the first place. He just wanted to find Dan, steal a few beers, and head back to his place. They could play drunk video games. Eat junk food.

Mariza shook her head, messing up her curls, then took Phil’s hand, leading him toward the kitchen. Once they got there, Marzia silently filled him up another cup of beer and handed it to him. For a moment, Phil glanced around the kitchen, looking for a trash bin, but when he looked up he saw Mariza giving an amused smile. It was then he realized the whole kitchen was littered with abandoned cups, so he placed his on the table and followed Marzia as she waltzed into the dimly lit sitting room. When the entered the room, Phil took a sip of the refreshing beer and wiped the sweat of his face. It was at least ten degrees cooler in that room and the noise wasn’t nearly so piercing. It was like a small island of quiet in the midst of noise, clamor, and debauchery.

“You don’t seem to be very into dancing,” commented Marzia.

“No! I-I am, I just…. Sorry I’m not very good at it,” admitted Phil. The internal cringe was getting worse the more he spoke, so Phil’s eyes began flicking over to the windows. Lit by a bonfire outside, he saw people from his school mingling about, yet he still couldn’t make out anyone who looked like Dan in the darkness. He considered possibly texting Dan an SOS. It would be worth the berating if he could get away from the heat, the noise, and the flirtatious stare that Marzia gave him.

It was odd. Phil had thought he had wanted this so much; by all accounts, the night was going even better than planned. Marzia paid attention to him, laughed at his lame jokes, tried to include him, and didn’t mind that he was inexperienced (in fact, she seemed to find it charming). She was nice, just as sweet Phil thought she would be, and she looked like a snowy angel in the midst of darkly dressed teen, having a unique style all her own. Yet all Phil felt was a weight on his chest and a longing to be with his best friend, someone who made him comfortable, someone whose touch made him feel at home, not spinning in space the way Marzia’s touch disoriented him.

“Well, I’m not very good at it either,” said Marzia finally, pulling Phil from the sea of his thoughts “Let’s dance how we want to then. Not like the others.” Phil couldn’t help but smile at what she said. It sounded so much like something Dan would say.

Marzia stood and held out her hands for Phil to take. Brazenly, Phil chugged nearly all his cup of beer (while Marzia giggled sweetly) and tossed the cup to the side of the couch. He took her hands, thus making all the brazen disappear, and she pulled him back into the center of the room. Her face and his were lit by the orange glow of the bonfire outside to one side, the rainbow of the moving discoballs on the other side, and that odd purplish light that creeped in under the slits in the curtains. She began to swing their arms almost playfully, like little kids, when the song “Bangarang” by Skrillex came on over the shaking speakers.

At first Phil was still, frozen in place like on the other, less private, dance floor, but soon he began to sway side to side along with his dance partner. A smile broke out on her face as their silly dancing became more frantic, with Marzia spinning like a ballroom dancer using Phil’s arm to guide her. At this, Phil couldn’t help but laugh, as not only was Marzia being cute, but she was breaking down that cool-girl exterior he had always seen at school. It was like a glimpse into the real Marzia, and almost served as an explanation for the quirks in the her style, from the way she wore lighter make up than the other girls, to her kitten-eared backpack her friends teased her about. Phil felt comfortable enough with this type of dancing to join in. He spun her around the room, eventually pulling her close so the two could sway like he’d seen his classmates do at prom, only following the upbeat of the dubstep song, so the swaying was less hypnotic and more playful.

The beer was finally starting to kick in more potently, and between the spinning from the dancing and the twisting of the lights on the wall, a heady feeling overtook Phil and began to banish those fears to the recesses of his mind. This wasn’t the first time Phil had drank. Plenty of times before, he had experimented with alcohol with PJ, Dan, and Louise in his basement. Usually it flushed his face, made him feel hot all over, brought out his flirty side, and took away his fears. Right now, between Marzia and the lights, Phil just felt like a child—fear gone, but none of the charge he usually got from drinking. Maybe it was the type of alcohol; Phil had no idea.

Apparently, Marzia did not feel the same lightness as him. As the song changed, she took a step back and placed a small, square piece of paper on her tongue. Printed on the paper was a yellow banana. At first Phil was confused as the paper began to dissolve on her tongue—was it some type of foreign candy?—when Marzia’s pupils dilated in the dim light of the room. Before he could make a move, she stepped foreword and laid a kiss on his lips.

Phil stood still as she wrapped her manicured fingers around the back of his neck and tried to deepen the kiss. It was Phil’s first kiss. Hesitantly, Phil opened his mouth, tasting the odd banana substance in Marzia’s mouth. The kiss was nothing like Phil expected. It wasn’t fireworks in his heart or twisting knots in his belly, no, it was the taste of banana and lipgloss, a buzzing worry in his mind he was doing it wrong, and the simple feeling of someone invading his mouth with their tongue. As he kissed Marzia, Phil kept his hands at his side and thought once again to Dan. Would Dan be upset? Phil wasn’t sure why his thoughts were going to his best friend in a moment like this. He knew in some part of his mind he should be participating more, which is when Phil’s brain sprouted the drunken idea that maybe he could practice kissing with Dan. That way next time Phil kissed Marzia, he could feel the feelings he’d always read about by using the techniques he practiced with Dan. That made sense. That thought made Phil actually begin kissing Marzia back with a little passion, now practicing for his practice with Dan.  As his tongue dipped onto her lower lip and his hands found their way to her petite waist, Phil began to picture how Dan would react. Could he get Dan to moan into his mouth? Phil tried to see if he could get Marzia to first, nipping softly at her plush lips.. Unfortunately, Marzia only giggled and pulled back (Dan wouldn’t have done that, he’d have been much more serious), giving Phil a little wink.

“This should be fun,” she said.

It was then that the drugs began to kick in.

When the room went from normal colors to what felt like inverse colors, Phil knew he was in trouble. In fact, his depth perception was slowly going off now, and he was having trouble keeping his hands straight, his face straight, could he feel his blood, why did he taste noise? Marzia wasn’t Marzia anymore—she flashed as Marzia, then she was an old man, then Marzia—what time was it? When did he end up on these stairs? How much time had passed? Phil went to grip the stairs, but felt too disassociated from his hands and missed. Marzia disappeared into the crowd with a wink.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every Monday my ass. Sorry guys, I will update this again this Monday and try not to miss again. I went back to college and it was a crazy week, so I forgot to update. Please leave a comment, I want to know if anyone is reading my trash.


	4. Acid

Dan was the pleasant type of drunk that made his face flush, so standing by the bonfire was no longer becoming an option. Besides, he was out of beer at this point and the only one still talking to him was Tyler—but he talked to everybody. Saying a goodbye to PJ and the others, Dan strolled back toward the treeline and took a pee. Once he was done with that, he waltzed back to the wraparound porch and followed it to the front entrance. It was time to check on Phil.

A weight seemed to lift off Dan’s chest as he entered into the mansion in search of his friend. The whole night his mind kept pulling back and forth like the ebbing of a tide—away from Phil then back to him. He hoped he was having fun with Marzia, but he also hoped Phil was having a terrible time with Marzia so they’d never have to do this again. The party wasn’t quite the problem anymore—it was the not being together that made it a problem.

As he headed into the lobby, Dan’s eyes slipped to the dance floor. While he searched the crowd for his blue-eyed best friend, he also thought about how much fun they’d have out there. They’d dance like dorks, maybe they could even get whoever was playing the music to turn on some old-school MCR or something. Once they got bored, the two could escape to one of the backrooms and drink the remainder of their beer…

Dan was snapped out of his fantasy though when Shane came down the stairs in a rush, making straight for Dan.

“Dan Howell! I need you right now. We have a situation upstairs,” said Shane, out of breath from the descent down the stairs. Shane’s hair was sweaty and following behind him was Ryland, who waited with a furrowed brow at the top of the stairs. The smaller guy kept looking over his shoulder down a hallway. Shane’s voice—usually high pitched, always poised for a joke—was lower, more serious. At this, Dan froze, feeling his skin prickle in fear worse than when he was in the car with Marzia and Felix.

“What’s going on?” asked Dan. _Please don’t be anything about Phil, please tell me Phil’s okay, please don’t—_

“It’s Phil,” said Shane. Dan bit his lip and began worrying it under his teeth “He’s tripping on something upstairs and no one can get him to calm down. Did he drop acid or something before coming here?” For a moment Dan was silent and he looked down, his eyes darting back in forth like he was flipping through a textbook in his mind, searching for the answers.

“No! Phil would never do something like that,” said Dan. His eyes snapped up and he saw not only Shane and Ryland staring, but a few nearby students as well. When people saw him glaring back, they looked away. Shane, always a sweetheart, looked even more concerned and began leading Dan up the stairs.

“He’s over here,” said Shane “Maybe someone slipped something in his drink.” Dan knew that Shane was just humoring him, but he was still grateful for his concern for Phil. Hastily, Dan took the stairs two at a time, eventually passing Shane up, and began to follow Ryland instead down a wide hallway littered with people. They led him to a bedroom with the lights off. As his eyes began to adjust to the dark, Dan’s heart pounded in his chest and made blood rush to his ears. There, in the darkness, he saw Phil sitting in the corner wide-eyed. Turning slowly to Shane and Ryland, Dan nodded, as if he were excusing them. With a shy smile, Shane left with Ryland, who looked happy to leave this all behind. Coming into the room slowly, Dan shut the door behind him.

“Um, Phil? Are you okay mate?” asked Dan carefully. Phil’s head snapped up and he looked up at him with dark eyes. Upon closer examination, Dan saw his pupils were blown out. This, with his quivering hands and tensed shoulders, made Dan approach Phil carefully like he was a wild animal about to bite.

“I… I… Dan is that you?” asked Phil. His voice shook as much as his hands. Suddenly, Dan’s concerned, which was warm like embers, lit into a fire of anger. He clenched his hands.

“Phil, what are you on? Did you take something?” asked Dan. He bent down now, stooping so he could make eye contract with Phil. Phil blinked rapidly for a moment, then backed up slightly into the corner.

“You’re face it’s… the colors are inversed, you-you…” Phil’s trailed off as he began to shake more. First, Dan tried moving further away, leaning back to give Phil some space, but when his friend’s facial expression didn’t change to look any less terrified, Dan reached foreword and took his hand. Phil’s hand shook in his and some part of Dan’s mind wondered what it would be like to hold Phil’s hand when he wasn’t scared of something.

“Shh, it’s okay Philly,” cooed Dan. For a moment, Phil’s shoulders relaxed. Dan had used his childhood nickname. With a small whimper, Phil scooted closer to Dan, holding out his arms as if he wanted a hug.

“Danny, I’m scared,” said Phil. If the circumstances had been different, Dan would have burst into laughter at how child-like Phil sounded. They hadn’t called each other “Danny” and “Philly” since grade school. Likewise, the look in Phil’s eyes made it more heartbreaking, as the fear that had overcome him internally was shining through. With only a moment hesitation, Dan crawled into Phil’s outstretched arms and wrapped his arms around his friend’s waist. Phil let out a long breath against Dan’s neck then dug his face into the crook of his shoulder.

Dan closed his eyes and tried breathing deeply in through his nose, trying to hold it together.

“It’s okay,” cooed Dan, his voice strained “You’ll be okay. Let’s just wait this out for a moment.”

They sat there in the cool, dark bedroom for a few minutes. The sounds of the party downstairs vibrated the floorboards, but otherwise the room was quiet. Occasionally, groups would pass by the door, chatting and laughing loudly. Dan felt a strange sense of calm holding Phil. After adjusting his weight to be distributed more evenly, he leaned back against the plaster wall and examined the room with ease. The marijuana and beer hadn’t worn off yet, so soon Dan was keenly aware of how messed up he was as the furniture around him wobbled. He squeezed his eyes shut to avoid the seasick feeling from the way the room moved. Phil’s breathing calmed but was hot against Dan’s neck, and his hair tickled Dan’s nose. All Dan could smell was the soft lavender of the bedroom—essential oils, most likely—and that wonderful Phil smell that reminded him of Phil’s bed, which Phil always insisted giving Dan whenever he slept over. It was one of those quintessential kind mannerisms that he always displayed, the kind of thing Dan felt he couldn’t repay. Even holding Phil like this wasn’t enough, but Dan couldn’t come up with any other solution other than the hospital, which was more of a last-resort. Part of Dan worried because he had never dealt with anything like this before—how would he know when Phil was bad enough to need a hospital? Regardless, as Phil’s breathing slowed and his tensed muscles melted to a calm, Dan figured he was starting to feel better.

That was when Phil moaned beneath him.

The sound was abrupt and actually made Dan lurch a little, the kind of little jump that came after a jump scare in a horror movie. The reaction was delayed by the alcohol, but the shot of adrenaline sobered him up momentarily.

“Phil?” asked Dan. Beneath him, Phil started to squirm and for a moment Dan wondered if he was going to throw up, because why else would he be moving like that? Did hallucinogenics make one vomit? Dan tried wracking his brain for information from the DARE program all the students had in middle school, but he could not seem to remember.

“I can’t handle this,” moaned Phil. He scooted back, pulling himself up to his knees, facing Dan straight on in the dark. The shadows cast on his face made his expression hard to read and Dan couldn’t tell if his pupils were still dilated or not. He could make out Phil pulling at his collar, though, unbuttoning the top button like he was hot.

“Whoa, you need to stay seated. I don’t want you getting hurt,” Dan put a hand on Phil’s shoulder, pressing him down “What’s wrong? Are you seeing something? Don’t forget your on something, so it’s not real, and I’ll keep you safe.” In the dark, Phil tilted his head to the side, then shook it kind of awkwardly. Dan mirrored the movement, also shaking his head in confusion.

“What is it then? What do you mean ‘no’?” asked Dan. To his surprise, Phil didn’t respond with words, but with actions.

Phil pushed foreword on his toes, stretching by the arch of his foot in his Converse to reach Dan. Dipping his face back towards Dan’s neck, Dan assumed his friend was just coming in for another cuddle. Instead of wrapping his arms around Dan’s shoulders, though, Phil placed both hands under Dan’s sweater and gripped his small waist. Dan had no time to react before Phil was kissing his neck aggressively.

If the room was spinning before, it began to tilt as Phil started kissing down Dan’s neck, biting softly at his collarbone. There was a confidence to the touching that was very un-Phil, his fingers were warm as they ran up and down Dan’s side with little to no hesitation. Dan was reeling, unsure of what was happening because it was all happening so fast, and the alcohol was clogging up his brain, making it hard to think. A trail of goosebumps followed Phil’s touch.

Somehow, they ended up on the floor, Phil straddling Dan as he worked his way from his neck up to his mouth. His skin was hot to the touch—Dan’s touch. As if on autopilot, Dan found himself reaching for his best friend, hands hovering for a moment before settling on his jaw. They kissed messily, all teeth and tongue and no skill, since neither of them (to Dan’s knowledge) had ever kissed anyone before. Phil broke the kiss, going back to Dan’s neck, which Dan already knew was an exceedingly sensitive spot, and he started sucking gently. It began to hurt, but it was a good hurt, and set off some kind of coil in Dan’s stomach that made everything ache.

“I’m so horny,” whispered Phil in a husky voice. This too made Dan’s stomach coil even tighter, because he’d never in their whole friendship heard Phil talk like _that_. It was also likely the crudest thing Dan had ever heard his friend say.

“I’ve never felt like this my whole life,” said Phil “I just need it so badly, Dan, please I—” Now that he was talking, Dan had time to think. To breathe. Dan knew this was not okay, not when Phil was like this, and they were _friends_ , just friends, where was this all coming from…

Slowly, a bit of that DARE information came back to Dan. Acid—he thought it was acid, maybe shrooms—was known to make people horny. Something about heightening the senses, the sex drive, and lowering inhibitions, just like the alcohol had lowered Dan’s inhibitions. Dan began to scoot away from Phil. The cool of the wood floor on his arms was bringing him back to reality. Phil, though, crawled foreword to meet him, dipping back down to proceed his ministrations on his friend.

“Phil, stop, this isn’t right,” squeaked out Dan. Something about the kiss had brought out not a husky voice in Dan, but a feminine one. Embarrassingly enough, his voice even cracked, which normally would secure him a round of teasing from Phil, but in this instance only made his friend smile saucily.

“It’s okay Dan, we’re best friends. Let’s help each other out,” growled Phil.

“Phil!” was all Dan could say, trying very hard to break through the wall of want for his best friend and instead pull himself upright. Despite the looks he gave him, Phil still had enough sense to abide by Dan’s wishes and pull away, giving them an arm’s length apart and a moment’s silence. After a few minutes of labored breathing and heavy silence, Phil’s head fell into his hands.

“What the hell am I doing?” said Phil. Dan was partly relieved, partly disappointed to hear all the sex gone from his voice and instead the intonation of his best friend emerging from it’s hiding place instead.

“It’s okay,” whispered Dan “It was just the drugs. Are you starting to sober up?”

“I… I still feel hot all over but… Dan, it’s _you_ , I wasn’t thinking about it being my best friend. Oh gosh, I’m so sorry, I—” before Phil could speak any further, Dan reached foreword and put a hand over his mouth. In the darkness, Dan could feel Phil lift his blue eyes to meet his. They both stared at each other in silence yet again, but their eyes said everything Dan needed to know. They had fucked up, majorly.

“It’s okay,” said Dan softly. Phil did a small shake of his head, almost a fluttering motion, so small it was barely there. It was like he didn’t want to admit it wasn’t okay, but he also didn’t want to lie. Dan removed his hand, but Phil just stared back at him. Scrambling, Dan looked away, and began twisting the hem of his jumper in his hand.

“Neither of us are sober,” stated Dan. Phil stayed silent. The tension rose quickly, alarmingly, and Dan felt like his brain was working too slow to form a proper response. What had they done?

“Let’s just pretend it never happened,” spluttered Dan. At this, Phil opened his mouth to speak, but in a panic Dan covered it again with his hand “If you want, we can talk about it later,” Dan added the last part, knowing Phil wasn’t one to let things just sit. Dan’s voice edged on panicked, sputtering out in a desperate attempt to stop any conversations he didn’t want to have. Despite this, Phil seemed soothed by his words, and nodded slowly. Then he opened his mouth, licking the inside of Dan’s palm.

“Oh ew!” squealed Dan, pulling it away. Phil laughed and the sound seemed to banish a lot of the tension in the room.

“Oh, so it’s gross now that it’s not your neck?” said Phil. Dan watched as he snapped his mouth shut, jaw clenching. Obviously, he couldn’t tell if it was okay to joke about it or not. To ease his worry, Dan let out a little laugh, wiping his hand on his jeans.

“It was gross when it was my neck too!” joked Dan. He reached foreword, pushing Phil’s shoulder lightly, as if to prove that they could still touch each other and it wouldn’t be weird.

“That’s not how it seemed to me,” teased Phil. For a moment, Dan thanked the stars for the dark, as he felt a blush crawl up his neck and warm his chest. He was sure he was definitely getting all splotchy from the comment and he was glad Phil couldn’t see.

“Yeah, you wish, Romeo,” retorted Dan.

As they exited the room, both boys kept telling themselves that it was okay. Friends experimented sometimes and they were both under the influence as well. In fact, Dan said that casually as they headed into the kitchen, grabbed a few more beers. Phil agreed and they both wrapped themselves in the little lie, holding on to it long enough to at least last the rest of the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've never written smut before, and this is probably as close as I will get for this fic. Please comment below if you liked it!


	5. Nicolas Cage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: some light homophobia at the end

“So, we’re staying here a little longer?” asked Dan, following Phil as they weaved through the dance floor.

“Why not? I’ve actually been having a crappy night. I really just want to have some fun. Besides, I don’t think we could manage to get into any more trouble if we tried,” said Phil. Dan followed behind as Phil led them back up the stairs now that they had secured drinks. Instead of going towards the room they had just been in to the left, Phil opted to take a right, searching for a balcony he had seen when they came in.

“You never told me with happened with Marzia. Or how you think you got drugged,” said Dan. He stopped as Phil yanked open a door, finding a side hallway that led to the balcony “Where are we going?”

“Secret,” said Phil. He brazenly walked down the mini hallway. There were doors to either side, one of which emitted a lewd moaning, and Phil shot Dan a look which made the latter giggle. They opened the door at the end of the hallway and were hit was a blast a cool night air. Stepping out onto the balcony, Phil found that their view was the dark forest to the right illuminated by the indoor pool house to the left. It was a spot he had scoped out upon entering the mansion earlier, and it seemed the perfect place to rest. The light was a soft blue, like the inside of an aquarium, and made the forest look otherworldly. There were already two lawn chairs and a pile of beer cans set up on the balcony, the convenient remnants of some other party goers. Shutting the door behind them, Phil took a seat in one of the lawn chairs like it was made for him, and Dan followed suit. The wind cooled the sweat that still lingered under Dan’s aesthetic crewneck, and Phil began adjusting his hair as the chilled October breeze pushed it to the side with a whistle though the trees. Looking up, Dan found the sky was covered a smattering of stars visible despite the lights of the party, and the sound from the poolhouse of girlish shrieks and splashes was drowned out by the enormity of the night sky. When he turned, Dan caught Phil staring, but the cool of the fall evening managed to extinguish his blush before it could emerge again.

“So, Marzia?” asked Dan. Phil looked down, shaking his head.

“Well, she kissed me, for one,” said Phil. Not allowing his mind to wander, quite deliberately not allowing that, in fact, Dan said the first thing that came to mind.

“Wow, you kissed two people in one night. You’re such a whore now, Phil,” said Dan, his voice dripped with sarcasm. He felt a surge of pride when Phil laughed, but still took a sip of his beer to get the image of Marzia kissing Phil out of his mind. At the beginning of the night, the beer had tasted sharp, but at this point, Dan drank it down as easily as water.

“Yeah, well, let me say this—our kiss was far less awkward than the one between her and I,” said Phil.

“Oh, that’s bad, because we were pretty awkward,” joked Dan.

Now it was Phil’s turn to take a drink. Dan’s eyes wandered to the pool house, trying to identify the shadows of the figures inside. He was happy to not be in there—he hated wearing a swimsuit. Just the smell of the chlorine alone was enough to make anxiety come sprouting like a weed in his stomach despite the dosing of alcohol.

“Yeah, well, I think the kiss drugged me. She put this weird little slip of paper on her tongue before doing it. Then she just left me. Oh, and before that, we tried to dance, and I was terrible at it,” said Phil. Dan couldn’t help but smirk, turning around to face Phil fully now.

“Why does that not surprise me in the least?” he said. Phil pushed his arm, as if trying to push him off the chair, but Dan gripped the handles and laughed.

“Oh shut up!” said Phil “I’d like to see you do better.”

“Oh, I have no intentions of dancing tonight, none at all. That would be a whole other level of disaster,” Dan said. They were both about halfway through their beers at this point and they’d only been talking for a few minutes. There wasn’t an underlying tension, per say, but instead this sense of new navigation as the two tried to joke about a situation they both hadn’t quite processed. Still, the banter was typical, and after such a foreign start to their night, Dan was reveling in the sense of normalcy. Still, the beer helped.

“Well what do you want to do with the remainder of our night then? Obviously the Marzia mission is a bust, but I don’t know when our next opportunity to go to a real party will ever come up,” commented Phil. Dan sipped his beer at the wind played with his hair, pondering the possibilities. He’d already gone to the bonfire and caught up with his friends. What else was there to do other than dance or swim?

Dan could think of a few things.

“I don’t know, but you make a good point,” Dan said softly.

“Yeah, I want to do something… I don’t know. I just know I’ve been wanting to see you since I got here because I always have more fun with you than anyone,” said Phil. Dan knew he was blabbering. Phil always seemed to get chatty when drunk.

“Okay, I have an idea,” said Dan, after a moment of silence. Chugging the rest of his beer, he stood up and tossed it over the balcony. Phil did the same, but wobbled as he stood.

“Okay! What are we doing?” asked Phil, his voice laden with alcohol-fueled excitement. Dan gave a cheeky grin, leading them toward the door.

“Well first, we are going to need to find a printer.”

* * *

 

“This is so stupid,” said Phil as he gathered the copies in hand. The papers were warm to the touch and he squinted in the dark to make sure the pictures had printed correctly. Meanwhile, Dan carefully closed the desk drawer, going as far to cover his fingers with the sleeve of his sweater to prevent finger prints (“What if his crazy family calls the FBI?” “Dan, you’re fine, the FBI doesn’t care about a stupid prank!”). In his other hand were the weapons of choice—some tape and scissors.

“I _know_ it’s stupid. That’s what makes it fun,” said Dan.

“You got this idea off the internet, didn’t you?”

“Most likely Tumblr, yeah.”

The two slipped out of the office quietly, making sure to peek around the corner as they entered the hall. They were in the west wing of the mansion which was virtually unoccupied. In fact, the only person Dan and Phil had encountered when going on their mad search for a printer was a sleeping girl in Logan’s room who they weren’t even able to identify because she was tightly wrapped in a blanket like a blonde sushi roll.

“The guest room is this way, right?” asked Phil in a whisper. Dan nodded and held a finger up to his lips, even though it was entirely unnecessary to be as stealthy as they were. The two walked down the hall to yet another guest room (begging the question of just how many guests the Paul family occupied at once) which was filled to the brim with family photos. In fact, upon finding the room earlier, Dan couldn’t help but laugh at the obscene amount of family photos that littered the walls. It was perfect for their plan.

“Okay, what now?” asked Phil in a normal voice once they were in the room. Flicking on the lights, Dan turned around and surveyed the room. Phil raised his eyebrows in surprise.

“I thought we were going to keep the lights off like we did in the office. We don’t want people to know we’re in here,” said Phil. Dan shook his head and gave a cheeky grin.

“That was an office, this is a _bedroom_. We’re fine, no one’s going to question why people are in here,” replied Dan. Reaching foreword, he took the papers from Phil and smiled in amusement. It was the kind of smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes.

“What do you mean ‘it’s a bedroom’?” asked Phil.

“Oh my gosh, Phil, really? You don’t… ugh, nevermind—” said Dan in exasperation. Phil blinked his eyes in confusion a few moments before it dawned on him.

“Oh! I get it!,” said Phil, “People will think someone’s having—”

“Yes! Yes! Oh my gosh, let’s stop talking and get on with the plan. By the way, these are perfect,” Dan held up a printed picture, showing a few bite-sized images of Nicholas Cage, approximately the size of a person’s face on the average family photo.

“You picked them out, of course you would think they’re good,” grumbled Phil. Dan ignored him, walking up to the photo wall with a smile that reached his dimples. The glint in his eyes was unlike something Phil had ever seen before; in fact, Phil soon realized that finally, he was watching a _reckless_ Daniel. Years spent never leaving the basement together had made Phil think Dan was tame, yet everything about the night was suggesting something different. Already, Dan had smoked weed in a speeding car with Felix, saved Phil from a drug trip, tried a new style, and snuck out of his house.

As Dan began removing the cardboard backing from the picture frame, Phil couldn’t help but watch his best friend in wonder. So many years they had spent being friends, yet Phil felt like he was hanging out with someone entirely new. Maybe it was the alcohol or the drugs, but Phil liked this new Dan. He liked the old Dan too, of course, but that night was making him feel things he had never felt before. A day ago, he would have balked at the fact he made out with his best friend. Now it seemed odd, but it wasn’t as mortifying as Phil would have thought. He wondered idly if this was just their alternate party personas or something. Even more so, Phil wondered if they would ever be able to be like this again. Desperately, Phil didn’t want this reckless streak to end, but a small part of him was already mourning the fact that the night was wearing away so quickly. He knew he had to make the most of his time with reckless Dan.

For this reason, Phil joined Dan, grabbing the scissors and cutting out the Nicolas Cage photos and following Dan’s lead in taping them over the faces of the Paul family. It made the work go by quicker, and that meant they could get back to partying. Dan raised his eyebrows, but silently kept at his work. They quickly synchronized their work, with Phil cutting the bit sized Cages and Dan taping neatly. Then then began to replace the backings on the photos, carefully hanging them up on the appropriate nails. They were getting to final pictures when the door handle jiggled.

Freezing, blue eyes met brown, and a small moment passed between them as the only noise in the bedroom was the jiggling of the door handle. Then, came a voice:

“Who’s in there?”

It was Jake.

All at once, Dan felt his blood, once pumping with adrenaline and excitement, run cold. The scissors and tape seemed ridiculous now, and his mind began to panic as images of Jake coming into the room filled his mind. Like a movie in his head, he could see the confusion turn to realization across Jake’s pretty-boy features. He could imagine how dumb and childish this would have to seem, how the entire school would watch as he and Phil were unceremoniously kicked out by Jake and his crew.

Once again, a tense silence filled the room, but Phil spoke up quickly. The words tumbled out of him, unplanned but loud enough so Jake could hear him through the door.

“It’s me. I’m kind of in the middle of something. What do you want?” Phil asked. Dan had to suppress a panicked giggle that unexpectantly bubbled in the back of his throat. Phil sounded so annoyed, and if he wasn’t frozen in fear, Dan would’ve hugged him for putting on such a good show. When their eyes met this time, Dan smiled, congratulating Phil silently on his quick thinking.

“Is Marzia in there?” this time, the voice was Felix. The smile dropped off Dan’s face—Felix sounded pissed. Phil’s blue eyes widened in shock and he took a small step back from the door, as if it were going to swing open any minute.

“Uh, no, I’m with someone else,” said Phil. The bravado had dropped from his voice now, and Dan began to bite his thumb nail, shifting his weight from side to side.

There was a moment when Jake and Felix mumbled to each other quietly. They couldn’t hear much through the door, but Dan was able to make out the word “liar” coming from Jake. As he listened, Dan began to realize that Felix didn’t sound as mad as he did worried. The muffled music of his voice lilted in concern. There were rumors that he was dating Marzia, but the two always insisted they were just friends. Not to mention according to Phil, Marzia had pretty much disappeared after they kissed. Besides, Jake and Felix were on completely different levels socially, and Dan was almost certain that unless there was really something wrong, Felix would never have paired up with Jake to go looking for her.

“It’s okay, I just want to make sure she’s okay,” said Felix this time through the door “Marzia, are you in there?” Before Phil could respond, Jake spoke.

“You better get your clothes on bro, I’ve got a key,” said Jake. He sounded almost giddy at the prospect of drama, and Dan would have made a face if not for the metallic noise of a key ring being leafed through. Phil swung his head around to widen his eyes at Dan, completely at a loss as to what to do.

“No! No, that’s not necessary he… he’s with me,” Dan cringed then he clarified “He’s with Dan.” There was a moment of shocked silence before Jake began hysterically laughing. Felix let out a short “Oh. Wow” and chuckled nervously. Once Jake had stopped hyena laughing, he hit the door a bunch of times, causing the boys to jump.

“I fucking knew it dude! Oh my gosh, congrats kiddos,” Jake laughed “Hey, I’m not judging just. Wow. I knew you guys were close but yeah…” Phil awkwardly cleared his throat.

“Um yeah so… can you guys leave us alone now? We don’t know where Marzia is,” said Phil.

“Yeah we’ve been in here a whole hour,” added Dan awkwardly. Phil gave him a confused look, and Dan waggled his eyebrows comically. With the danger subsiding, the ridiculous nature of the situation was starting to hit him, and Phil had to hold back a laugh.

“Yup, we’re off!” the sound of Jake and Felix walking away made Dan finally relax his shoulders. That was, until an echoing voice yelled down the hallway “Don’t forget to use a condom!”

* * *

 

Dan and Phil had hung around in the bedroom a little while after Jake and Felix had left. The two were sobering up and talked in length about everything that had happened.

“Do you think Jake’s going to tell anyone about you and me?” asked Dan suddenly while Phil was in the middle of wondering aloud where Marzia went. Phil stopped, blinked, and leaned back against the bedframe. They were seated on the ground, having finished up their prank and stashing the offending scissors under the bed.

“What’s there to tell? We just made out,” Phil mumbled. Dan facepalmed and groaned.

“No, you spoon, I mean about him catching us in here. He sure thinks we did more than make out, and I don’t blame him as this seems really suspicious,” said Dan. He looked down at the hardwood flooring, picking something off his Converse and not meeting Phil’s eyes. At first he considered replying with something sarcastic about how they were actually quite suspicious, but sensing Dan’s anxiety, Phil chose to be more serious. He sighed and looked foreword in thought.

“I don’t know, maybe. Does it matter?” he asked. At this, Dan tilted his head up to look at Phil, but when their eyes met he looked back down at his shoe.

“Well yeah, what about Marzia? You don’t want her thinking you’re gay,” replied Dan. The floor beneath them squeaked as Phil shifted uncomfortably.

“I don’t think that matters anymore. I don’t really wanna be with Marzia,” said Phil. From the corner of his eye, he saw Dan snap his head up and give him an intense look. Before he could ask why, Phil continued “I mean, she abandoned me at a party and slipped me some mystery drug, which was really not a cool thing to do.” At his words, Dan’s posture seemed to relax a little, and he pulled down the sleeves of his sweater before sliding lower onto the floor.

“You’re telling me,” mumbled Dan.

“And anyway, I wasn’t having that much fun with her before that. She’s a nice girl but…” Phil floundered unsure about how to describe exactly what he felt for Marzia. It definitely wasn’t distaste or hate or anything… but it sure wasn’t love, as he had once thought.

“Not your type?” supplied Dan. Phil shrugged, finally meeting his eyes.

“I guess. I’m not sure. I just know it doesn’t matter to me if she thinks I’m gay or something,” said Phil.

The sound of their breathing and the noises of the party downstairs filled the room for a moment as they sat in comfortable silence. If it hadn’t been for the neat hardwood and plush bedding they were leaning against, Phil would have felt at home. Getting to just chat with Dan felt normal and natural, as easy as breathing.

“Well, I don’t want anyone thinking we’re gay,” said Dan. His voice dipped low, and beneath it was an anger that Phil hadn’t heard for quite some time. He raised his eyebrows.

“What, I’m that bad?” he joked. Dan didn’t smile, instead he shook his head, curls bouncing.

“Phil, people have been accusing me of being gay since grade school, but I’m not,” griped Dan, “You have no idea how aggravating that is.” Phil scrunched up his face and shifted his weight so he was on his knees, facing Dan head on.

“First of all, people ask if I’m gay all the time, and it doesn’t bother me. What’s so wrong with being gay?” he asked.

“Oh stop, you know that’s not what I mean! It’s just, I like girls, I feel like I’ve made that super clear to everyone,” said Dan. The anger was rising in his voice, so much so Phil considered just acquiescing as to not ruin the night. Still, this nagging feeling in the back of his mind made him push foreword.

“Okay, look, I don’t want to start a fight. But seriously, it’s not that big of a deal if people think we’re dating,” said Phil.

“Maybe not to you,” grumped Dan. Upon seeing the hurt look on Phil’s face, he let out a sigh “Okay, no, that’s _not_ what I meant. Everything I’m trying to say is coming out wrong. Let’s just drop it, okay?”

There was a beat of silence in which Phil sat there, feeling miserable and hurt. Lucky for them, they heard a voice down the hallway calling their name. It was PJ. When they both stood up and headed toward the door, Dan stopped to admire their work. Both had almost forgotten what they’ve done after the fallout of Jake leaving.

A whole wall of pictures depicted the Paul family at various events with Nicholas Cage faces-- it was absolutely beautiful. The boys met eyes and laughed, delighted with their work.

“Can we both agree this was the best thing we’ve done all night?” asked Dan, unable to contain his giggling. Phil moved closer to him, slinging an arm around his shoulder affectionately, relieved that Dan wasn’t mad anymore.  

“This is only the best thing we’ve done so far,” he replied.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spelled Nicolas Cage wrong and I'm not sorry.


	6. Hickeys

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: characters being outed

The voice in the hall had been PJ. When the two emerged from the bedroom, trying not to look too awkward, PJ’s face split into a wide grin. His face was flushed the way it always got when he drank, and the sight was familiar to Dan and Phil who had spent at least a few nights playing drinking games with PJ in Dan’s basement. Yet the new context made it all that more exciting, and when the two made it to the end of the hallway, Peej was practically bouncing on his toes from excitement.

“Guys! I’ve been looking all over for ya,” he slurred. Dan couldn’t help but laugh, as PJ couldn’t help but be a messy drunk. “Come on! Let’s go drink.”

“Are you sure you need more dude?” asked Phil with a laugh, but nevertheless they followed him down the winding stairs. After sorting their way through the crowd gathered in the lobby, the boys found themselves entering into a back dining room near an open-air porch. In the middle of the room was a table set up for beer pong. It wasn’t the rickety types of table that Phil had seen in movies or on TV; no, it was an antique looking wooden table that was now stained with different types of beer spills and blue vodka. The room was dimly lit with string lights that were interweaved through a chandelier above them.

As Dan followed PJ into the lean-to, he noticed that the kids in the lobby were staring with bug eyes. He thought—no, he knew—they were drunk out of their minds, but he couldn’t help but feel like maybe they were staring at him. It could have been his pink sweater, but no one except for Phil had even mentioned it that night. It also could have been because Phil was perfectly fine after tripping on drugs, but the stares seemed more directed at Dan than Phil. Dan tried to brush the thoughts away as paranoia, but he wasn’t quite sure when he began to hear whispers. He followed PJ into the back room.

At first the group was playing beer pong, which neither Dan nor Phil had any interest in joining in. They stood to the sides leaning against the wall and getting progressively more sober.

“It’s been quite the night, hasn’t it?” asked Phil with a smirk. Dan returned the look knowingly as they glanced over at their friends. Currently, Louise was cheering her head off as Tyler, her teammate, landed his ball into a cup. The group chatted loudly to hear each other over the booming bass from the room down the hall. To the side of them, PJ was gossiping in a slurred tone with Anthony, something about seeing Jenna on the roof, but they were unable to hold a clear, coherent conversation despite their best efforts. Being the most sober in the group was starting to suck, but Dan figured that the night was winding down anyway. It was midnight by now and he wasn’t sure how long parties like this lasted, but he really didn’t want to be around when the cops broke it up. He glanced down at his phone—dead. Leaning back against the wall, he sighed his bangs off his forehead as the heat began to make sweat prickle in his armpits. He was bored, hot, and sober. Glancing over at Phil, he searched his friend’s face for a sign that he was ready to leave. Phil’s eyes were closed as he leaned his head back against the wall. Dan pushed him gently, and his eyes fluttered open.

“What?” asked Phil, his voice barely audible with all the noise in the room.

“Can we go?” asked Dan. To his dismay, Phil wrinkled his brow.

“What do you mean go? We haven’t even really gotten to party,” said Phil. Dan rolled his eyes.

“We’ve done quite a bit, if you ask me, and I’m bored,” whined Dan. Phil scrunched up his face, standing up a little straighter.

“I’m not ready yet, let’s just play the next game and we’ll decide then, yeah?” said Phil. With a sigh, Dan relented, going back to leaning against the wall and glowering at everyone. He had his fill of partying for one night and was just about ready to head back with Phil. Plus, he really didn’t want to walk home drunk, but there was no way he would have someone drive him either. He thought about how stupid he’d been when planning this whole thing out. They would be walking home way past curfew really, really drunk. They would be dead if they got caught, but the only other option was staying the night, which would mean their parents would kill them instead. All this brooding was putting Dan into a worse and worse mood, making his want to go home growing stronger by the minute.

“Phil, can we _please_ go? Come on, we’re not even doing anything,” he moaned. Phil was now talking to PJ, planning a round of a new game.

“Five more minutes!” said Phil with a wave of his hand. Dan briefly considered being pouty and making a move to leave without him, but with all the noise and action around them he doubted Phil would even notice.

“Guys, hey, yo!” yelled PJ a few minutes later, trying to talk over the chatty group “We’re going to play never have I ever! Who’s in?” The whole group cheered and raised their hands, but when Dan kept his arms firmly crossed, Phil grabbed his hand for him and forced in into the air. Next to them, Louise started cooing about how cute Dan was in an obnoxious, drunk tone.

Dan really, really wanted to go home now.

PJ began to explain the rules to the group, and Dan found a chair off in the corner. Sitting, he crossed his legs and watched the group with a snarky look on his face. Phil shot him a look, but he just rolled his eyes, hoping his bratty mood would make Phil realize that he was done.

PJ explained that everyone needed to hold up ten fingers. They would go around the group saying things they had never done, and anyone who had done those things would lower a finger and take a sip. Whoever had fingers up last would be the winner, and the prize was half a cup of some expensive whiskey PJ had stolen from a cabinet in the basement. It seemed silly to Dan because either way they ended up pretty drunk. On top of that, he knew for a fact that he and Phil were the most inexperienced in the room, and “winning” this game would just serve to embarrass them.

For this reason, Dan decided it would be more fun to lie.

The group situated in a kind-of, lumpy circle around the room, pulling up chairs or sliding up to sit on the table. Phil took a seat on the group next to Dan, nudging his leg gently and beaming up a grin at him as if it would improve his mood. Dan responded with another eyeroll, which only heightened when the first “never have I ever” was

“Never have I ever had sex!”

It was such a cliché starter question, in Dan’s mind. A few people put their fingers down and drank, including Dan. No one in the group really noticed except Phil, who let out a little squeak of surprise.

“What?! Who? You never told me!” he said loudly. Dan grimaced and shook his head, but everyone’s heads turned to look at him.

“Yeah, I did, it was a few weeks ago. That girl on met on the internet,” lied Dan, hoping Phil would play along. Phil just stared at him looking hurt and confused.

“Oh shut up Dan, you’re fucking lying,” said Anthony from across the room. A few small giggles filled the room, and to Dan’s relief they seemed to move on without much to-do. That was, except for Phil.

“You’re lying, right?” asked Phil in a small voice from the floor. Dan wouldn’t meet his eyes, he just shrugged.

“I don’t know, am I?” he said. To this, Phil was silent, but Dan could tell his feelings were hurt. Yet, since he was in a bad mood Dan really didn’t care, he just wanted to get this over with and go home.

“Never have I ever been out of the country.”

When Dan drank to this one, no one questioned it, even Phil who knew he had never even left the state, much less the US. When Dan glanced down on him, Phil was less giddy and a little more serious. His eyes were trained on the game it seemed.

The next few “never have I ever”’s were rather tame. Dan went with a tame one himself (“Never have I ever been on a boat”) and Phil’s was quite the same (“Never have I ever been skiing.”) Dan was down to only a few fingers by the next round with his lying, although for realistic sake he left his fingers up for a few of them. Yet when the went the next turn, everyone started to ask dirtier and saucier questions. The questions began to bounce from person to person, questioning the validity of the finger dropping.

“Never have I ever eaten ass!” someone said and Dan, who was busy texting someone from Phil’s phone, put down a finger without thinking and took a sip of his drink. The whole room burst into laughter and when Dan looked up, he saw all eyes trained on him. Even Phil, who at this point was still pretty sober compared to the others, couldn’t help but add in a chuckle as he flicked Dan’s thigh teasingly.

“Liar!” giggled Phil.

“What—no, I’m not!” said Dan, much to his own surprise. In fact, when he looked up from the phone, everything seemed to move in slow motion. He looked down at his cup of jungle juice, which was now almost empty.

_Oh shit_ thought Dan _have I been drinking when it wasn’t my turn?_

People yelled and rolled their eyes, telling Dan they knew he was cheating or lying. With the alcohol now coursing through his veins, Dan puffed up his cheeks in indignation.

“Have so!” he yelled back, to which people in the crowd responded _Oh, yeah, with who?_ or _Sure Howell, we all know you bottom_ and the like. Phil crinkled his brow, but his laugh was more confused and worried than amused.

“With a friend,” said Dan. People the crowd only laughed harder and questioned him further until PJ finally broke in.

“Okay, Dan’s obviously disqualified, who’s turn is it next?”

“I shouldn’t be disqualified,” the words came out of Dan’s mouth without him thinking “You all have no idea what I’ve done! This game is stupid.”

“Dan, stop, you’re drunk,” said Phil gently, reaching for the cup. Dan yanked it away, shooting Phil a glare that he didn’t really mean, so then he mumbled an apology that was equally as slurred as the rest of his speech. Phil sighed and just patted his knee. In fact, Phil was now the most sober in the room, and even in his alcohol-addled state Dan still felt this indignant happiness that Phil was getting a taste of his own medicine. PJ just ignored them and went on.

“Phil and Hazel, you guys are the ones with the most fingers up, so it’s time for you to go head to head! Winner gets this fancy-ass vodka—I mean, whiskey? I don’t know. GO!” Phil stood up and met Hazel at the table as their friends made silly comments and cheered. They began to go back and forth, and Dan was only half-paying attention the whole time as he played Candy Crush on Phil’s phone.

“Never have I ever had a hickey!” said Hazel. When Phil didn’t drink, the room broke into commotion.

“Phil, you’re such a liar!” yelled Hazel. Dan glanced up and saw her pointing at Phil’s neck. His stomach did a flip-flop as he looked up and saw the dark purple mark on Phil’s neck—the mark he gave him. Unknowingly, his hand lifted up to his own collar and he felt the matching bruise that sat overtly on his neck as well.

“What are you talking about, I—”

“Look, he has one right there!” yelled Louise. PJ and a few others went closer and examined his neck.

“Whoa, Philly! What have you been up to tonight?” asked PJ with a laugh. Phil’s face turned a deep red and Dan laughed at his friend’s embarrassment. Suddenly, the laughing in the group quieted as a voice in the doorway said

“Check out Howell’s neck, I bet he has one too.”

The group turned and saw Jake in the doorway. In one hand he had a red solo cup, in the other he had his phone with the light shining into the dark room. He was videotaping, probably for his infamous Snapchat, which he boasted about updating everyday. Being of a completely different social class, the members of the group awkwardly greeted Jake while others darted their eyes over to Dan. Jake turned the camera on Dan.

“Isn’t that right, Dan? My party has been bringing everyone together, hasn’t it?” joked Jake.

“Oh, fuck off,” growled Dan from the corner. The others were silent, but Jake gave one of those superior ass-hole laughs that showed he didn’t care. At the same time, Tessa Brooks and Marcus walked into the room, greeting some on the others and plucking cups of beer off the table like they owned the place.

“It’s okay Danny-boy, we’re totally here for you. That’s a really nice love bite your bestie gave you too, I dig it,” said Jake. Next to him, Marcus echoed “love bite?” in sarcastic confusion and Tessa told Jake to stop being so nosey. Both sounded insincere as they gazed at Dan like he was a science experiment.

 Dan stood up, but he stumbled, looking anything but threatening. PJ furrowed his brow, looking between Phil and Dan with confusion. Their faces told it all, both were bright red with shame. PJ’s eyes widened as he took it all in.

“Wait, Dan, is he serious? Did you guys really—”

“No!” said Dan at the same time Phil said “Not quite!” Their eyes met as half the room gasped and Jake, still videotaping, let out a surprised laugh. Tessa’s mouth dropped open in shocked as she went “Oh my gosh!” and Marcus hit Jake’s shoulder saying “you owe me five bucks, dude!”

Phil sent Dan an agonized look, but Dan couldn’t help but simmer with rage. Phil turned to the group.

“We didn’t have sex we just—it was my fault really, I was on some kind of drug and we made out and... We’re not together, we’re just friends and—” PJ cut Phil off at the same time as Jake.

“Bro, we all know you’re together!” crooned Jake, but PJ simply said “Dude, it’s okay, we really don’t care. You don’t have to tell us that kind of stuff, just ignore him.” To Dan’s mortification, Louise ran up and hugged him, but he just stood stock still. The rest of the group tittered in excitement, but Tessa and Marcus were already over it, looking at something on Tessa’s phone.

Having had his fun, Jake lowered his camera and took a sip of Marcus’s beer, plucking the cup straight from his hands. He shot Dan a smug look that made him want to punch him and glanced at his friends.

“Well my gay matchmaking is done, where to next bros?” said Jake. Tessa held up her phone for Jake to see a text.

“Chance says they opened up the panels above the pool and someone’s going to jump in from the roof!”

“Hell yeah!” yelled Jake, high fiving Marcus and wandering out of the room. In his wake, he left a shell-shocked Dan and Phil, who stood their quietly as their drunk friends simultaneously tried to comfort them and question them as well.

“Dan, I—”

“I want your prize,” replied Dan firmly. Phil shot him a confused look before glancing over at the whiskey that was left abandoned on the table.

“You mean the whiskey?” he asked. Dan nodded and Phil reached over, handing him the cup. Dan took it and gave a brazen chug before standing up. He teetered to the side before righting himself and marching out of the room to everyone’s dismay.

“Dan, where are you going?” asked Louise as she, Phil, and PJ followed him into the hallway. Dan shook his head as if to shake away the dreary feeling that was beginning to seep into him from the shock of the alcohol at once. The whiskey had him feeling brave, stupidly brave, and he weaved his way down the hallway as his friends followed after him.

Dan didn’t know why, but he felt pissed, most pissed off than he’d ever been. The feelings he had been trying to sift through all night had been laid bare for all to see. He didn’t know what making out with Phil meant, but there was no way he could know now that everyone else would be questioning him on it. Phil didn’t make matters any better and looked like a sorry puppy dog as he followed his friends down the hallway.

Dan didn’t know why, but he needed to get out of that room. He needed to get away from his friends. He didn’t have the words to address Jake—he didn’t even know how to begin to combat what he’d said, because it was true that he and Phil had done stuff together that night. But he knew he had to do something to get Jake back. He couldn’t fight him, but with the liquid courage coursing through his veins, Dan figured there was only one thing left to do—make new gossip before this one could spread. It would take a lot to keep a story about him and his best friend being outed to distract the whole school, but he had a plan:

Dan was going to jump off the fucking roof.

 


	7. The Most Fun

“Dan, where the hell are you going?” yelled Phil from down the hallway. Dan, turning his head slightly to the side, yelled back at him. Around them, the noises of the party and people streaming by made it hard to hear.

“I’m going to the roof. I’m jumping into that pool,” he said. At this, Phil’s mad dash to follow Dan stopped, as he froze in place in shock. PJ and Louise, though, only sped up their pace. When Louise caught up with him, she grabbed Dan’s wrist and forced him to spin around to face her.

“Wait, you’re going to do what?” she yelled.

“Dude, are you serious?” asked PJ. Phil jogged to catch up with them, dodging around a few girls as they made their way down the hallway. He slid against the wall and scooted over to the group, where Dan was looking to the ground, his jaw set.

“Let me go guys, I can make my own decisions,” said Dan, yanking away his hand from Louise and continuing his barrage down the hallway. The three followed him despite his attempts to shake them by speeding up.

“Dan, this is crazy!” yelled PJ behind him “You’re too drunk for this and it’s a really stupid idea. Come on, slow down!”

“This is all my fault,” mumbled Phil as he trailed behind Dan. It was only loud enough for Louise to hear, although Phil was really only saying it to himself. She shook her head and took his hand as Dan turned down a side hallway.

“No, this isn’t! He’s just drunk and being a drama queen,” said Louise with an eyeroll. Phil nodded minutely, but didn’t say anything else. As usual, he and Dan were on the same wavelength, so he knew what this was all about, but wasn’t sure if Louise thought the same. Obviously, making out had been a mistake, and Phil was feeling guiltier than ever because he was the one who initiated it. In all eight years that they’d been friends, Phil had only seen Dan this mad a handful of times.

            As the group made their way up to the roof, Louise turned to Phil with a growing frown.

            “I don’t want to pry, love, but is it true?” she asked in concern. Phil glanced over at her for a moment before training his eyes back on Dan, who was pausing to ask some girls which way Jake had gone. Meanwhile, PJ was scoffing, shaking his head, and trying to talk over Dan, commanding the girls not to tell Dan what he wanted to know. The girls, in confusion, pointed down a side hallway, and without thanking them Dan was off with PJ hot on his heels. Phil and Louise followed behind more meekly.

            “Is what true?” asked Phil, even though he knew. Louise pressed her lips in a line and shot him a look. “Yes, it’s true. Please don’t tell anyone. Obviously, Dan thinks it’s a mistake.”

            “Was it a mistake for you?” asked Louise sagely. Phil almost stopped his walking for a moment, wanted time to think over the question, but instead answered automatically and without thinking.

            “No,” he said softly. Before Louise could respond, though, the group of four found themselves on the roof.

* * *

 

            The roof was dimly lit from the light of the pool below, casting everything wavy blue. Leaves skittered in the wind and crunched under the feet of about thirty of so teens who had gathered on the roof to see Jake’s latest gag. Noise echoed up from the open poolhouse below, as the people within began clearing out the deep end of the pool. The air smelled of bonfire, leaves, and pool chlorine, as well as the sweat of excited young people. Phil knew that if he turned his head, he could find the balcony he and Dan had sat on earlier when he was coming down from his high. Whether the high had been from Dan’s lips or from the drugs he had been slipped was still a mystery to Phil, but he did know that it had been the best moment of the night before everything went to shit. Phil sighed, turning back to the Dan, who now was physically prying PJ off him as he ran toward the gathering crowd at the edge of the rooftop.

            Pushing his way through, Dan found Jake in the center perched on the edge, shining the light of his camera over and speaking to his Snapchat audience. When Jake saw him, he raised his eyebrows goofily.

            “Oh, hey Howell, where’s your boyfriend?” asked Jake. Before Dan could speak, Phil stepped foreword into the ring that the crowd had formed around them.

            “I’m not his boyfriend,” said Phil, causing Dan to whip his head around.

            “Phil! Go away,” hissed Dan through his teeth. Phil shook his head, looking between Jake and Dan nervously. He looked practically owl like and his hands shook as the people around them began to whisper. Likewise, Jake chuckled, still deliberately easygoing.

            “Awe, a lover’s spat already?” he cooed. Dan grit his teeth, shooting Phil a poisonous look as if Jake’s taunting was his fault. Phil looked away in shame and melded into the crowd, standing beside PJ and Louise, who was wringing her hands in worry.

            “What does he think he’s doing?” whispered PJ to Phil angrily. Phil could hear the tone in his voice—it wasn’t a malicious anger, but the worried kind that was ever so parental, and ever so PJ. Phil couldn’t do anything but shrug. Around them, the night air was cooling, an odd calm in conjunction with the charged air between Dan and Jake.  

            “Are you jumping off?” asked Dan coolly. He pulled the sleeves of his light pink sweater down, accommodating for not only the cool breeze of the outdoors, but also the nervous goosebumps that were prickling up on his skin. Jake rolled his eyes and laughed, looking down to his Snapchat to add a caption. As he spoke, he didn’t bother looking at Dan.

            “No way dude, I’m trying to see if anyone around here has the balls,” at this, Jake’s eye glinted evilly, and he caught the curious glances of his audience “You should have two sets of balls, between you and your boyfriend. Are either of you volunteering?” When Jake looked to Phil, Phil didn’t hold his gaze for even a moment, choosing instead to study the dirt that had marred his once perfect high tops. The group around them tittered, and Phil blinked in confusion as a bright light hit his eyes. Some of the girls in the group were also Snapchatting the conversation, whispering to each other conspiratorially.

            Dan seemed to puff up, sticking his chest out, which wasn’t exactly masculine looking in his pink jumper. Still, Jake quirked an eyebrow.

            “I’ll do it, but on one condition,” said Dan. Jake’s face broke out on a smile and the crowd started cheering. He stood up fully now, clapping a big hand on Dan’s shoulder in a half friendly, half aggressive way.

            “Alright bro! What man, I’ll do anything,” said Jake. He gave a boyish look, mugging for the crowd. Dan swayed a bit on his feet, still obviously drunk but trying to seem sober as possible. He watched Jake with a deadpan look on his face and in his eyes.

            “Stop telling people I’m with Phil. I’m—we’re not together, and I’d appreciate it if you stopped the rumors,” griped Dan. People in the crowd laughed, and somewhere Phil heard someone stage-whisper that everyone already knew they were “gay fucks.” When Phil looked over to his friends, he saw Louise’s eyebrows knit in confusion and PJ shooting dirty looks to the people in the crowd around them. Phil could feel his face turning bright red, and he unbuttoned another button on his shirt, only further revealing his hickey but also cooling him down.

            “Awe Howell, you and I know I don’t spread rumors,” Jake said without even a hint of irony “But I’ll let you guys keep your little love-fest private if that’s what it will take to get someone to jump off this roof. You in?”

            Jake held out his hand as the crowd around them got louder and louder with cheers, rumors, Snapchats, and gasps of wonder.

            Dan took Jake’s hand and shook it.

* * *

 

**A Few Days Earlier**

A lull had fallen over the practice room. The window, cracked open, blew in the noise of the gym class outside, bringing in sounds of faint yells and worn sports whistles. Still, Phil barely heard that over the sound of Dan’s piano.

It was soft, gentle, and warm. It was the hidden parts of Dan that many thought were not there but Phil had always had the privilege to see. When he played, a peaceful look fell over Dan’s features, a veil that consumed the fire in his eyes and made it less panicked, more manageable.

They didn’t talk, but Phil wasn’t bored. In fact, he never wanted the moment to end. There was just something so wonderful about piano music, the smell of crisp fall air, and being around his favorite person in the entire world.

It was the most fun he had ever had.

* * *

 

**Friday Night**

Dan wouldn’t hug Phil in public, but when he left into a side room to change into a pair of swim trunks he had borrowed from some random guy at the party, he did concede to give Phil a brief, albeit strained, hug. PJ was still relentless in his attempts to dissuade Dan, pulling up Google articles about how not-safe it was to jump from that height, begging Dan not to jump over something as stupid as a rumor. Louise had resigned herself to watching the boys in shocked silence, clutching her handbag a little tighter than normal, eyes darting around the room. Of course, as Dan brazenly began to strip his clothes in front of them, she politely closed her eyes.

“Phil agrees with me, this is stupid,” said PJ. Dan glanced up from his dressing, giving Phil a heart-stopping look. His eyes, no matter how gorgeous, were clouded over with shame and alcohol. Phil’s mouth went dry, and he swallowed.

“It is Dan, please, let’s just go,” said Phil, although his resolve was about as broken as Louise’s at this point. PJ sighed angrily through his nose.

“You had your chance earlier,” growled Dan “I don’t want to leave now.”

“Dan!” yelled PJ.  To everyone’s shock, Phil sniffed as tears began to prick his blue eyes. He was just so overwhelmed with worry for his friend, he really couldn’t handle Dan’s snark at the moment. For a moment, regret danced over Dan’s features, but it didn’t stay very long. Phil wiped his cheeks with the heel of his hand.  

“Great going Dan, you made Phil cry,” snapped Louise from her corner. She looked up, her made-up face no longer angelic looking, but instead rage filled. To this, Dan rolled his eyes, bunching up his clothes in one hand and tossing them aside.

“Whatever, Phil shouldn’t be so sensitive,” said Dan.

“Phil’s not the one who’s sensitive here. He’s not the one pulling some stupid stunt to prove he’s straight!” replied PJ. Dan’s jaw clenched and he opened his mouth to speak, then shut it again.

“Guys, I’m right here, stop talking about me like I’m not,” whimpered Phil. Louise stood up, placing a hand on Phil’s shoulder soothingly.

“PJ’s right, Dan, this is stupid. If anything happens to you, we’re not going to be okay. Are you really willing to risk your life over something this small?” she asked. At this, Dan spoke.

“It’s not small, okay? This may not seem like a big deal to you guys, but it is to me!” yelled Dan.

“Why?” responded PJ with equal fever “What’s the big deal about people thinking you’re with Phil? Anyone who matters knows you guys are just friends.”

“Because Peej!” yelled Dan “I don’t even know what’s going between me and Phil right now. How am I supposed to figure that out when everyone’s all involved?”

“Going on? What do you—“ PJ began to speak, but Phil cut him off.

“Guys, can we please not talk about this right now? Please?” he said. Louise squeezed his shoulder, which was supposed to be comforting but only made Phil want to cry more. Already tears were rushing hot behind his eyes and he had to swallow hard to keep them from falling. PJ stared at Phil a long moment, but Louise spoke up.

“Yeah, let’s just drop that for now,” she said hurriedly “But seriously Dan, jumping off the roof isn’t going to fix anything.”  Dan paused to look at the mirror that was propped against the wall in the make shift dressing room. The swim trunks were a bit loose on his skinny frame, and he kept his black undershirt on to hide the hickeys that lay beneath, but overall he looked alright. When he turned his gaze back to his friends, he looked almost sorrowful.

“I know but… I’m doing this guys. You can leave if you want but—”

“No,” said PJ with finality “We’re not going to do that. If you change your mind last minute, we’ll be there to drive you home. And if you get hurt, it’s only right that we will call the ambulance.”

A silence fell over the room as the weight of PJ’s words set in. Louise gave a resigned sigh and walked away from Phil to grab PJ instead.

“Alright, fine. Do the stupid thing. But talk to your best friend first, you guys obviously need to work some things out before you go back out there,” said Louise. PJ, still confused, followed her, whispering something asking her what she meant, but she ignored him. Once the two were in the hallway, Phil finally stood up from his chair to face Dan.

“Dan, I’m sorry, this is all my fault,” said Phil. Dan didn’t say anything, only set his jaw in silent contempt and looked away. Phil sighed, not sure what to say to fix the situation, but feeling the pit of guilt weighing heavy in his stomach.

“Just… be careful, okay? I… I care about you,” choked out Phil. Dan bit his lip now, letting some of his softness show despite the circumstances.

Gently, Phil stepped foreword, kissing Dan’s cheek. At this, Dan’s face lit up bright red, but he somehow managed to choke out some words.

“I’ll be fine. I’ve got this” he said with uncertainty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lol, Dan's kind of a dick in this story.


	8. Victorious

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Definitely wrote this listening to Panic! At the Disco "Victorious." Another good song for this fic is "Don't Threaten me with a Good Time." I know it's 2018, but I've been getting back into mid 2000's punk bands again. Sue me.

The cheers reminded Dan of the kind screams that must have been heard when people were battling to the death in Greece. It was a want for blood, guts, and gore—it was the thrill of secondhand danger. Dan’s heart thudded in his chest as he stood back bare foot on the gravelly roof. A small wind tossed his curls around and smelled like bonfire. By now, Dan was downright cold, as his veins were ice and the outdoors had cooled his nervous sweat.

Beside him was Jake, who was talking to his Snapchat and screaming with excitement.

“Dude, Howell’s going to do it! Any last words bro?” at this, Jake turned and shone the light in Dan’s face. Dan blinked, taking a step back and glared at Jake.

“Yeah,” said Dan with a bravado almost completely created by booze “Fuck you.” At this, the crowd gave another scream, with people laughing at Jake and slapping him on the back. Jake gave Dan a smirk that was meant to seem playful, but held a darkness behind it. A threat. Dan swallowed hard, turning his attention to the path he was mapping out in front of him.

At the opposite end of the roof stood his friends, with Phil twisting his hands nervously around the hem of his shirt. Dan felt a flash of irritation. He was the one who had caused this in the first place. Immediately, those thoughts were extinguished as Dan remembered that this wasn’t Phil’s fault at all, but his own. If he didn’t care what people thought—if he knew what was going on with him, with them, this wouldn’t be happening. Dan was the one with something to prove. The logical part of his brain was screaming for him to stop, but he was able to push it back with a mixture of alcohol induced bravery and fear induced stupidity.

He met Phil’s eyes from across the roof. Phil gave a sad little side-smile that made his heart melt. Dan licked his lips and nodded at him. The energy between them was intense, so much so Dan could feel it from across the roof, and it made him want to throw himself into his friend’s arms and cry. A part of him felt tender, sore, worried that this would be the last time his eyes would meet Phil’s like this. He shook that thought aside, allowing for no other thought than that he would make it safely across the roof, through the glass opening, and into the pool. There wasn’t room for other options.

Jake was still babbling on, unable to keep his mouth closed for a minute.

“Come dude! Get going if you’re going to do it! Jump!” conjoled Jake. With one last side glare, Dan positioned his leaden legs and bounced a little. He was going to do this. Without a second thought, he began his ascent, running as fast as he could, eyes glued to the lip of the roof as he judged the distance to the best of his abilities. The people beside him formed a straight row and several stuck out their hands for high fives. Dan ignored them, focusing on getting himself over and above the lip of the roof. He worried his foot would get caught and he would trip. Soon, he was airbone, leaping as high as the speed allowed him. When he passed the lip of the roof without worry, the first hurdle had been met.

As he moved through the air, everything seemed to go in slow motion. The next task was to get through the opening of the glass pool room. Dan had thought he would have more control over this, but once he was flying through the air he knew that what would happen would happen. He squeezed his eyes shut, tensing up to ready for impact. His breath caught and for a moment the sounds of the cheering melted away. He couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move. For a moment, his stomach lurched in the way that it did when he jumped off the high dive at the local pool as a kid. It was a moment when his body was ready to hit something but was still airborne for just a minute too long.

Suddenly, Dan was underwater. His eyes popped open as his mind immediately raced to do a body check. Nothing hurt or ached, nothing was numb, everything was floating, wet, alive. Dan stayed in the water stock still for a moment, his mind unable to process what he had just done. He had made it. He had successfully jumped from the roof into the pool.

Nothing felt real until Dan’s head broke the surface of the water. That’s when the echoing cheers of the pool patrons hit him, bouncing off the walls of the dimly lit pool house as people began jumping in the water alongside him. The crowd pulled him out and into the air again, with a few meaty guys resting Dan on their shoulders as everyone cheered. Dan laughed, shaking his wet hair out of his eyes as he was paraded around the pool. Looking up, Dan noticed two pairs of eyes staring down at him. First was Jake’s, who had a moment of darkness pass over his face as he glared at Dan, but like a lightening strike it was gone, replaced with cheering and gawking equal to his peers around him. Next was Phil’s.

Phil smiled sheepishly, and waved. Beside him, Louise and PJ were yelling and hugging, with obvious relief painting their faces. Dan, feeling high off the adrenaline, made a motion for Phil to come down to meet him, cocking his head to the side. Phil smiled and nodded before disappearing to the back of the roof. PJ and Louise didn’t notice him leave, and when Dan met their eyes they started yelling to him about how dumb he was, but it was playful, lighthearted.

Eventually, the crowd let him down, throwing Dan unceremoniously into the water. When he emerged again, a few of the people starting splashing him playfully as Dan found his way to the edge of the pool. Pulling himself up, water streamed off his wet shirt and made him feel suddenly heavy. A small crowd formed around Dan with people he didn’t even know asking what it was like, if he had been scared. Dan gave a lopsided grin.

“It wasn’t too bad,” he lied. He hoped no one noticed his hands were still shaking.

For a few minutes Dan enjoyed the attention and played in the pool with his new found popularity. After a while, as people began to peter away to find booze or gossip, Dan pulled himself fully out of the water and padded over to Phil, who was standing near the entrance to the pool house with a towel in hand, along with Dan’s jumper, jeans, and underwear.

“I’m glad you’re okay,” murmured Phil, at first avoiding his eyes before glancing up at Dan to give a genuine, heartfelt look. For a moment, Dan’s breath caught. He wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or the adrenaline rush he still hadn’t fully sobered up from, but in that moment, he felt himself being pulled toward Phil. Instead, Dan cleared his throat, taking the towel from Phil and beginning to dry off his curly hair.

“I’m going to go get dressed,” said Dan, then suddenly “You want to come with?” He hadn’t meant to ask that. It was an odd request, but Phil didn’t object, he simply followed Dan into the house and down a side hallway. The side hallway tapered off to a few short staircases, leading to a basement with three mirrored dressing rooms. Dan knocked before entering one of the rooms.

Once inside the private room, Dan decided he didn’t need to hold back anymore. The minute he pulled the wet tshirt off his body, he spun around and grabbed a hold of Phil’s chin, pulling him in for a kiss.

 

 

 


	9. Forgetting About the World

Their first kiss had been heated, but it was nothing compared to what Dan was doing now.

Pressing his bare chest up against Phil’s clothed body, Dan threw all caution to the wind. It was equally terrifying as jumping off the roof, but twice as thrilling. When thoughts popped into his head, Dan ignored them, letting them swim away into the pool of alcohol that clouded his brain.

His hands moved from Phil’s jaw line to his back, pulling him close as Dan snaked his tongue into his best friend’s mouth. At first Phil was frozen in shock, his hands set at his side firmly, but his mouth relented and he began kissing Dan back. This small amount of reciprocation immediately sent blood pooling to Dan’s groin and before he knew it he was hard and pressing needily up against Phil. Pulling back from kissing his lips, Dan set to work at peppering Phil’s neck with more kisses, nipping and biting with no thought of being gentle. Phil hadn’t reached out to touch him yet, but he moaned softly as Dan began to move his hands lower. His heart began to pound hard enough that Dan was sure Phil could feel it, and the rate only sped up as he moved his hand from the small of Phil’s back to the front of his pants, beginning to rub at his growing erection.

The heat, the touching, the moaning, it all stopped at once as Phil took a large step back, knocking himself into the wall.

“Dan, we can’t—” Phil was out of Dan’s space, so Dan decided to amend that. He moved in closer, reveling in the heat and spark between them.

“I know we’re just friends, but I don’t care. Phil please, I want to feel your—” before the dirty words had a chance to come tumbling out of Dan’s drunk mouth, Phil cut him off. They were close enough he could feel his breath on his cheek.

“Stop right there. No, Dan, you’re not sober. Maybe… maybe when we are out of here. And sober. I don’t want you doing something you’d regret. I care too much about you,” said Phil. At this, Dan pouted like a child, and didn’t move out of Phil’s space.

“Do you mean it? Later?” asked Dan quietly. His eyes flicked over Phil’s figure with a coyness that was surprising. Phil didn’t meet his eyes, but nodded yes. He wasn’t sure if sober Dan would want to do this later, but he was beginning to realize that he himself might. Phil knew they were supposed to be “just friends” but he wasn’t like Dan. He didn’t need to put a label on things, on himself. He knew that he loved Dan enough that if they were to be something more, that wouldn’t ruin their friendship. It just felt natural. In that moment, though, it was obviously not right. Dan couldn’t consent, first off, and second off, it just was not the right place. Dan was clearly still coming off an adrenaline rush and was feeling reckless. Phil didn’t want to be a reckless choice—he wanted something more deliberate.

Despite putting the brakes on the kissing, Dan hadn’t moved away from Phil yet. Phil gave a goofy little grin, trying to signal to Daniel that he should move, but Dan didn’t. Instead, he leaned foreword to whisper in Phil’s ear. His words were slurred—he smelled like whisky and chlorine.

“Later, huh?” said Dan, his hand sliding over to rest warmly on Phil’s waist. He snaked his way under Phil’s shirt, fingers brushing his ribcage and making Phil shiver “Later we’ll continue this, later you’ll let me—”

“Sure,” Phil cut him off again “Just as long as we can both consent. And right now, you need to focus on getting dried off and dressed.” Gently, as not to offend him, Phil slowly inched his way from under Dan’s pinning him against the wall. He took his friend by the shoulders and directed him toward his clothing. Dan gave a cute, almost childish whine.

“But I don’t want to put my clothes on! I want to take more off with you and—”

“Later,” commanded Phil with a giggle. Horny, drunk, and childish Dan was new to him, and undeniably charming. With a pout, Dan got to work with pulling on his pink sweater. His face with ruddy and only got worse when he put on the warm sweater. Then, hooking his fingers on his wet swim shorts, Dan slowly wiggled them off his body with a coy look tossed Phil’s way from over his shoulder. With a smirk, Phil allowed himself the indulgence of looking, noting how visibly hard Dan had gotten from their interaction, as well as the roundness of his butt. It wasn’t a lie to say that he felt a stirring in his own pants, but he ignored it.

It wasn’t the first time Phil had felt this way towards Dan, but because of his feelings for Marzia, he had ignored it. Phil didn’t really know what his sexuality was, but out of all their friends Dan had been the only one he’d ever felt like this for. He tried not to think of it too much, tried not to overanalyze it. Thus far, they’d had a crazy, albeit good night. Phil didn’t want to ruin it by overthinking everything, so unlike Dan he chose to let it go. Once Dan had his clothing back on, he made moves to start kissing Phil again, but Phil gently took him at arm’s length. Dan made a pouty, childish face that made Phil laugh.

“Later,” Phil promised, opening the door to the now too-hot dressing room back into the hallway. Dan followed him, still pouty. His hair was still wet and extra curly, which matched with the pink sweater made him look absolutely precious in Phil’s eyes.

“So what are we doing now?” asked Dan. Phil took his hand without a care who would see, leading him down the hallway.

“Well I think that should be obvious,” said Phil “We’re going to go celebrate your amazing stunt! Everyone can’t stop talking about it.” The two made their way down the hallway, the noise of the party leaking in from the top of the staircase.  

* * *

 

Phil wasn’t good at dancing, but a few more drinks loosened him up real quick. Actually, now he was not only okay with dancing, but _convinced_ he was good at it.

PJ had met them at the top of the stairs and immediately whisked the two off toward the kitchen for celebratory drinks. Phil eyed the dark living room where he’d kissed Marzia, and tried to shake off the memories from the drugs earlier. It still bothered him that Marzia would do something like that—she always seemed so sweet and nice! Phil decided to chalk it up to this whole “party persona” thing he’d seemed to be experiencing all night. That, and he also used the tequila shots Peej had lined up to forget about it.

They had been drinking all night, so it wasn’t hard to get drunk again. Daniel was downright sloppy at this point, leaning heavily against Louise and slurring.

“I—did you see me? I jumped off a fucking roof, Louise! Ha! Jake’s the gay one now,” slurred Dan. Louise laughed, ruffling his curly hair in a motherly fashion.

“Okay Dan, sure. I hope tomorrow you remember this so I can tell you how stupid you were,” she said cheerily. PJ nudged Phil, handing him a cup of jungle juice. Feeling brazen, Phil chugged it down.

Things were a bit blurry between the kitchen and the living room, but Louise convinced the group to dance. At first it was the four of them, dancing all silly in a little group, but soon the music switched from pop junk to a Panic! At the Disco song, and then they got serious. Louise got distracted by a friend walking in, and PJ was pulled off to the side by Chris, leaving Phil and Dan to each other.

To Phil’s surprise, Dan spun around and began to grind against him in the same way that Marzia had. Maybe it was their comfort level with each other or the alcohol, but Phil actually joined in. He snaked an arm around Dan’s waist, letting his friend dance against him in an all to provocative way. When the song changed, now to some old-school MCR, Dan spun around so he was face to face with Phil. Getting too close for comfort, Phil had enough wits to step back (even though the dancing they had just done was pretty gay, if he was honest), and wouldn’t let Dan’s lips near his. It was a wonder that Dan was acting like this—going from being so mortified at being possibly outed that he jumped off a roof, to brazenly grinding against his guy best friend on the dance floor. It gave Phil whiplash.

Seductively, Dan help up the cup of jungle juice. Phil reached for it, but Dan pushed his hand away. Still swaying to the music, he put the cup to Phil’s lips, and Phil drank down more alcohol. He chugged the whole cup.

They danced for some time more, but both were too drunk to stay standing for much longer. They found their way off the dance floor, but neither of them would remember it in the morning, both “browning out” at this point. They ended up in the back yard. Going to the tree line, Dan decided he needed to pee without warning, and unzipped his fly. Phil had found a vape pen in his pocket, which PJ had given him on his way out the door with Dan. They both wandered into the coverage of the forest, just far enough past the tree line that they were shrouded by the dark. Sniffing the vape pen, Phil discovered it was just weed. Flopping onto the ground, relieved by the coolness of the night, he pulled the pen to his lips and began smoking.

“Gimme some,” said Dan, reaching over Phil to get the pen. He was slow and smelled like a bar. Phil gave a cheeky grin, pulling it just far enough from Dan’s reach that he couldn’t get it. Dan ended up falling face first onto Phil’s lap with a laugh.

“If you want it, you’ll have to get it from me,” slurred Phil. Pulling the pen to his lips, he took another inhale, then slowly let the smoke rise from his lips like he’d seen Dan do earlier with Felix. Being so drunk, he could barely feel the effects of the weed.

Instead of reaching for the pen again, Dan crawled onto Phil’s lap, pressing his lips to his friend’s yet again. Unlike the other two times in the night, neither were sober now, not even in the slightest. Both relented to the kissing, finally giving in fully to what they had wanted all night. It wasn’t heated either—it was lazy, affectionate kissing. Phil took another hit from the vape pen and Dan inhaled the smoke from his mouth. They did this for some time. Their skin cooled it the night air and they could smell weed, sweat, and the wet smell of the forest. Beneath Dan’s knees, pine needles dug into his shins. The bark from the tree Phil was leaning up against was scratchy and dug into his back. Neither cared. They were lost in kissing, lost in their alcohol addled minds, cross faded from the weed, a level of relaxed and carefree like they’d never been before. Dan’s stomach hurt from all the booze and dancing, but as his fingers ran through Phil’s hair, he forgot about that. Phil ached from being on his feet all night, but as Dan let out a moan into his mouth as he bit his lower lip, he forgot about that.

For a while, they forgot about everything but each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fanfic can now also be read on Wattpad.com. You guys might want to check it out just to see the awesome cover art. Same title and author name :)
> 
> These next few chapters may wander a bit because I don't have everything planned to a T like I did to the previous chapters leading up to this. Likewise, this story is still nowhere near to over. I have some of the other plot points planned for later, I just need our boys to develop their relationship a bit. 
> 
> Also updates will be spotty as I am finishing up uni this semester. I promised myself tonight if I finished a few papers, I'd buy dnp tickets. Whoop.


	10. Enough Adventure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: homophobia and violence

Around 4 AM, Phil’s phone began buzzing from a call from Louise. Pulling back from his neck, where Dan had been working on leaving a sizable hickey, Dan scowled.

“Ignore it,” he said breathlessly, dipping back down to continue marking Phil as his. Phil ran a soothing hand down Dan’s back which felt so natural it was scary. Still, he reached over, sliding the screen to answer. Phil had lost track of time, but considering the posse had hit the dance floor at 2AM, obviously a lot more time had passed than Phil had thought. They needed to think about heading home soon. Phil really didn’t know how they would do that, though, considering his head was still spinning.

“Where are you?” asked Louise as soon as Phil picked up.

“Uhh…” said Phil, unsure how to respond. He couldn’t just tell Louise he was making out with Dan in the woods, could he?

“Hi Louise!” piped Dan cheerily. He leaned toward Phil’s ear and was so obnoxiously loud it hurt Phil’s ear.

“I’m—Dan and I are in the woods,” explained Phil hastily, as if that made it better.  Louise sighed, sounding momish as ever.

“Are you lost?” she asked. Dan heard this and started giggling, mumbling a sarcastic “sure” and going back to sucking on Phil’s neck. Phil tried swatting him away, but was too tired. He ended up resting a hand on Dan’s back, pushing his way underneath his friend’s sweater and feeling the sweat sheened skin beneath. When Dan nipped at a particularly sensitive part of his neck, Phil moaned into the phone receiver.

Louise made a disgusted noise.

“Okay, guys! No! I didn’t call to hear that,” she couldn’t help but let out a little giggle “I just—I wanted to give you a warning.”

“A warning? About what?” asked Phil. He sobered up a bit, sitting up a little taller against the tree causing Dan to whine in a bratty sounding way. Dan readjusted and just rested his forehead against Phil’s shoulder, mumbling now about how he felt ill.

“I’m going to throw up,” grumbled Dan. Phil pushed him off.

“Well don’t throw up on me,” said Phil to Dan, putting his hand over the receiver. He returned to his call with Louise “What’s going on?”

“Well, Logan thinks you stole something and he wants it back and he said something about beating you up, I think. I told him you wouldn’t steal anything but Jake says you guys have been acting suspicious all night and also something about Nicolas Cage?” Louise said in a rush, ending her sentences like confused questions. She waited for Phil to confirm anything she’d said. Phil turned to widen his eyes at Dan, but Dan had walked quite a ways into the forest and was vomiting into a nearby bush.

“Oh um, well… See Dan had this idea for a prank and—” Phil shook his head, cutting off his own explanation “So, um, should we leave?” On the other end of the call, Louise sighed.

“No, see, that’s the other thing. Apparently, there are cops waiting down the street for people who are walking home. They just have their car parked their waiting for drunk teenagers to walk by without having to bust the Paul house. So now everyone’s kind of scared to leave,” explained Louise. Phil pinched the bridge of his nose, holding in a curse despite the fact he _never_ cussed in front of his friends.

Dan had finished throwing up by now and unceremoniously wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. He fell down beside Phil and rested his head in his friend’s lap, humming in content.

“So what should we do?” asked Phil. Louise gave another worried sigh, and Phil could practically see her twisting her long blonde hair in worry.

“Well, Logan and Jake’s friends are scouring the perimeter looking for you. My advice is I would find them before they find you and explain that you didn’t take anything,” Louise paused “You didn’t take anything, right?”

“No!” exclaimed Phil, loud enough that Dan opened his eyes from his position on Phil’s lap and cocked an eyebrow “We just replaced a bunch of the family photos with Nicolas Cage.”

“You—what?” Louise said, then after a beat “Was this a stupid prank idea Dan got from the internet?”

“What do you think?” retorted Phil.

“Of course. Well, if you guys want to find me, I’m near the back porch by the bonfire. I can Snapchat Logan to meet you here if you’d like.”

Phil looked down at Dan who was watching him with wide, curious eyes. Phil sighed.

“Yeah sure. See you in ten.”

* * *

 

“I kinda wanna keep making out instead,” giggled Dan as they picked their way across the forest edge toward the lawn. Phil smiled at him, ruffling his best friend’s hair. Despite the fact he was nervous that the Paul brothers were after him, Phil couldn’t help but feel kind of light and happy.

After making out for the past hour, it felt like a tension had lifted between the two. They were both still a little drunk and high, but Phil felt positive that this—whatever it was—would continue on in the morning.

Hopefully.

“I kinda wanna do more than make out,” ventured Phil. Saying something so outright flirty made his stomach knot up a little, but overall Phil trusted Dan enough that he knew he wouldn’t repeat anything dumb he said. There was some kind of wonderful safety that came with flirting with one’s best friend.

When he glanced over, Dan was blushing so red, it was apparent even in the moonlight.

“Oh yeah?” he said “Like what?”

Lucky for them, they reached the treeline, officially reentering the party. There were a lot less people now that it was getting close to daybreak, but the bonfire was still going strong behind the house. A stereo played near the sliding glass doors. Picking their way across the lawn in a giddy, secretive silence, Dan and Phil made their way over to Louise. When she saw them, looking up from the light of her phone, she smiled big.

“Hey you two! Okay, so I asked Jake about it and here’s the deal,” she said, crossing around the bonfire to greet them on the dark, dewy lawn “Logan says that his mom’s cameo necklace is missing from its place in her room and that just so happens to be the room you two decided to replace with pictures of Nicolas Cage. Jake told his brother he remembered seeing you guys in there and now, they kind of want to kill you. I guess this necklace is like super important or something, I don’t know. What are you going to do?” Stepping a little closer to Dan, Phil brushed his hand against his. Dan linked pinkies with him secretly behind their backs. The party was still going on and they were wrapped in the sounds of talking and music, and Louise watched them with red-tinged eyes from doing god-knows-what.  

“Well, you said we should talk to him, right? I guess that’s really all we can do since it’s not like we could leave or anything,” concluded Phil with a shrug.

“Okay, well then, I’ll make sure Logan’s on his way,” Louise looked down at her phone and began typing.

“He’s not going to beat us up or something, right?” asked Dan, a tinge of worry in his voice. Louise shrugged, not looking up from her phone.

“Probably not, you know how guys like him are,” she said. While her eyes were averted, Phil reached for Dan’s hand, releasing his pinkie to give it a squeeze.

“Louise is right, we’ll be fine. We kind of already had enough adventure for one night,” said Phil.

* * *

 

While waiting for Logan and Jake, Dan and Phil sat down near the fire feeling oddly calm. Well, not completely. Dan kept twisting his hands while bouncing his knee and Phil kept looking up from his phone nervously. Louise sat beside them, texting away on her iPhone in search of PJ, who had been missing for a while at that point. It felt like they were in the waiting room of a doctor’s office, which wasn’t necessarily chaotic but instead a time in which they didn’t know how _bad_ something would be yet. Would Jake beat the shit out of one of them? Or did they just want an explanation, truly? They were quiet, warmed by the fire and liquor. Deciding it would be best to go into this conversation sober, Phil had stopped drinking, but Dan had acquired yet another beer. This was the most alcohol either of them had ever consumed their entire lives. A little part in the back of Phil’s brain nagged him that that was the only reason Dan kissed him. He hoped it wasn’t true.

The chill of the fall night was still full force and it was dark, although the horizon peaked with the slightest suggestion of light blue. The sun had not broken yet, but in an hour or so, it clearly would. The party had died down significantly. Not even half of the participants were still around. The music had gone from blasting to a low hum a few rooms away. Most people were either getting high in the backyard or had disappeared into various rooms. The main group by the fire were the remaining “nerds” while the cooler kids were either inside or palling around with Jake. A few others lingered across the lawn sat on the ground, popping pills and looking up at the remaining stars in the dying night.

            Dan leaned closer to Phil. He wanted to reach out to him so badly, but held himself back. Louise kept looking between the two, cocking a curious eyebrow but not saying anything. Phil had enough sense to know she would question him in the morning about all of this.

            That is, if he didn’t end up in the ER or the back of a cop car.

            Jake appeared first, like a ghost. One minute, they were alone and quiet, the next Jake was standing in the light of the fire, scanning the faces for Dan or Phil. Dan noticed him first and clammed up, his mouth feeling dry and unable to say anything. He stayed frozen in his seat, not even alerting Phil to his presence. Soon Logan also emerged from the darkness along with the other members of Team Ten, who were all chatting loudly. Louise and Phil snapped their heads up from their phones and stood up.

            “Jake!” said Louise too loudly “Phil wanted to talk to you and—”

            “Yeah, I just wanted to explain, Dan and I didn’t steal anything. I promise,” interrupted Phil nervously. He took a step toward the Paul brothers, who squinted their eyes suspiciously. Logan glanced over at Dan, who sat looking pale in the light of the campfire.

            “Okay, but dude you were, like, the last person I know who was in there,” accused Jake.

            “Yeah and you were obviously dicking around with our family photos,” continued Logan for his brother. They both took a step closer to Phil, who stepped back cautiously. Dan stood up then squinted as the members of Team Ten began shining their Snapchat lights on him.

            “We didn’t do that! We weren’t in there for—for that,” said Dan. Jake laughed without humor and looked over at his brother in disbelief. Logan shrugged and threw his hands up in exasperation.

            “Dude, you were the one making a big deal about not being together earlier. Why does the story keep on changing with you bro?” sniped Jake. The members of Team Ten murmured their agreement, saying “Yeah, seriously?” and “Holy shit, this again.” Dan looked over to Phil and Louise in desperation and they looked back with worry on their faces.

            “Look, regardless, Dan and I didn’t steal anything. You could pat us down if you like, I promise you won’t find anything,” said Phil. At this, the members of Team Ten laughed and Jake made an over the top disgusted face.

            “Ew no way! I bet you’d like that, faggots,” said Logan brashly. At this, the people around them began to suck in gasps of air and go “broooo” while Jake turned to his pals.

            “I wouldn’t call them that because I’m cool with the gays, bro. But these two? Well obviously they’d like that a bit too much,” crooned Jake.

            “What the fuck is wrong with you?” yelled Dan suddenly. The members of Team Ten quieted in shock as Dan balled up his hands in fists at his side. Jake, Logan, Phil, and Louise turned to Dan with looks of disbelief.

            “Excuse me?” asked Logan threateningly. In his peripherals, Phil shook his head slightly, trying to get Dan to be quiet. Dan shrunk back a bit.

            “It’s just—you keep bugging us all night,” Dan began, the anger bubbling up inside him once again “What is your problem with us? Why are you such—such assholes?” said Dan. Logan once again took a menacing step foreword as Jake egged on his group of friends, stage-whispering “Oh shit’s about to go down.”

            “Hey dude, you’re the one who stole from us and is acting like a little bitch about it,” said Logan.

            “Phil told you—we didn’t steal anything!” said Dan. Logan rolled his eyes.

            “And you said earlier you weren’t a faggot. You’re obviously both liars. So do you want to give us the necklace back or do you want me to get it from you?” said Logan. He cracked his knuckles like a movie character and Phil took a step forward, trying to get between the two.

            “I’m so sick of your shit. I don’t owe you an explanation and even if I had it, _which I don’t_ , I wouldn’t owe you your damn necklace back, you rich fuck” said Dan with anger tinged in his voice. He shook his head as Logan’s face began to turn red with rage.

            “Dude, I’ll give you five seconds before I beat the shit out of you for talking to me like that. You’re at _our_ house, remember? What makes you think you’re such hot shit, you stupid fucking twink?” said Logan. At this, the Team Ten members made a ripple sound of noise, with a few even beginning to chant about a “fight.” Phil had gone into full on panic mode at this point, grounded in his spot between Logan and Dan. Still, he had no idea what to say.

            “No, I don’t have to take your shit anymore. I’m so sick of the people at this school and all your bullshit. The best part of this party was when I fucked with your stupid family photos, because you entitled assholes deserve it,” said Dan, puffing up his chest “I’m out of here. Come on, Phil.”

            When Dan turned on his heel to leave, Logan lunged at him, reaching to grab his shirt collar. Phil panicked and grabbed onto Logan’s shoulder in an attempt to keep him from hurting Dan, accidentally pulling him to the side. Unfortunately, Logan’s knee landed in the coals of the dying fire. Sparks flew up and the crowd that had formed around the conflict jumped back. Logan yelled out an enraged “Fuck!” and leapt away from the fire.

Looking down at his jeans, Logan noticed holes has been burnt into them from the fire, and the skin underneath was an angry red that was now blistering. A second degree burn. Phil took a few quick steps back, but before he could get away, Logan turned and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, popping a few buttons.

            “Fuck you, Lester,” said Logan before reeling a hand back and punching Phil square in the nose. As Phil stumbled back, Logan let go of him, allowing him to hit the ground with a thud. He then spun around to Dan, who was standing there with his hands covering his mouth. Logan smirked at him.

            “Keep the necklace, faggot. Maybe you can pawn it off to fix your boyfriend’s broken nose,” said Logan. With that, he stalked off, with Jake and his friends trailing behind. As they walked away, Jake began asking if anyone had gotten a video of the fight for their Snapchat. Dan’s stomach roiled.


	11. The Necklace

On the ground, Phil let out a long moan, holding onto his nose. A crowd formed around him. Dan, still shaking with residual fear, shooed them off, only letting Louise stay. She crouched over Phil and propped his head on her lap. Already, a large purple bruise was forming and swelling on his delicate cheekbone and his entire chin was slicked with blood. Leaning in closer, Dan couldn’t tell if it was broken or not.

            “Phil? Oh God, are you okay?” asked Dan. At this, Phil began to smirk, but that smirk soon turned to a wince as he moved his face muscles.

            “What does it look like?” he mumbled. Louise stroked Phil’s hair back from his face and looked up at Dan, unsure as to what to do.

            “Um, do you have a concussion?” asked Dan stupidly. This time, Phil stared at him deadpan, but beneath it was a sort of disbelief and sarcasm in his eyes. He was making a deliberate effort not to make a sassy face.

            “How the bloody hell am I supposed to know?” he responded. Dan fluttered his hands nervously, then wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans.

            “Well ugh… how many fingers am I holding up?” asked Dan, flashing a peace sign. This time, Phil couldn’t hold back an eyeroll and a cringe.

            “That’s just a stupid thing from movies, Dan,” he responded.

            “Whelp, I think he’s fine,” said Louise, scooting away and gently placing Phil’s head on the grass. He groaned, squeezing his eyes shut. “If he had a concussion, he’d be acting a lot more confused and a lot less cheeky right now. Your nose might be busted though.”

            “Well, I hope not. Ugh, my face is killing me,” said Phil as he sat up. Blood slide down his face and dripped off the edge of his chin onto the grass below. Without thinking, Dan cuffed his sleeve and wiped the blood away, although it was little use since Phil was still bleeding quite hard. Louise made a face that was equal parts exhaustion and fondness.

            “You two are taxing,” she said cryptically “Dan, go help him clean up. I’ll message some friends and see if we can get a ride home.” With that, Louise stood up, looking absolutely drained. She pulled out her phone and stalked off toward a garden in the back, seating herself on a bench underneath a willow tree.

            Dan turned his attention back to Phil. For a moment, they stared at each other, and Phil gave a little half smile that hurt his face even more.

            “I can’t believe that even happened,” said Phil. Dan frowned.

            “I’m so sorry, it’s all my fault,” he said. Around them, the crowd was leaving, and Dan was unsure if it was to give them privacy or because they wanted to see what trouble Team Ten would get into next.

 Phil looked terrible. The busted half of his face was lit by the orange of the coals of the dying fire, and the yellow light peeking up above the treeline behind them made his skin look a sickly green pale. His shirt was wrinkled and the buttons lay on the ground beneath them. His elbows were smeared with dirt from being pushed down. Unsurprisingly, there were purple bags under his eyes from exhaustion which only complimented the yellow and blue bruise on his cheekbone. Still, his eyes held humor in them.

“Only a little your fault. What you did was really stupid,” Phil paused “But also really cool.”

“Here, let me help you up,” mumbled Dan. He leaned down, slinging an arm underneath Phil’s armpit and helping him stand. It wasn’t hard, considering it was Phil’s face that was hurt, not his legs, but he wobbled a little from the blood loss as they stood. Silently, they headed toward the house, with Dan keeping a watchful eye for any of the members of Team Ten.

Once they had gone through the kitchen and found their way up the stairs, Dan finally spoke.

“How was that cool?” he asked incredously. Phil shrugged.

“You finally stood up for yourself. In fact, you’ve kind of been a badass overall tonight Mr. I-Jumped-Off-A-Roof,” he said. Dan couldn’t help but smile gently and shake his head.

“That’s hardly cool. Besides, you’re the one who took a hit for me,” Dan tested a door in the hallway, found it was locked, and moved on to the next one. It opened, revealing a large bathroom with an in-floor jacuzzi tub. Dan refrained from rolling his eyes at the unnecessary luxury.

“Well, that’s not cool. I just didn’t want your pretty face messed up,” joked Phil. Finally, Dan broke out in a laugh, although it didn’t stop the guilt leaking from his heart.

“Wow, one kiss and suddenly you’re this major flirt,” joked Dan. He led Phil over to the sink and released him. Phil looked at his reflection in the mirror and raised his eyebrows in shock.

“Whoa, I didn’t realize I looked this terrible,” commented Phil. He turned on the tap, filling up his cupped hands with water, and splashed his face. The water in the marble sink turned milky orange from the blood and dust. As he cleaned himself, Dan found a dry hand towel in the cupboard and handed it to Phil, who gently wiped his face without any pressure. As the pure white towel began to dirty, Dan felt a small victory. After they hurt his Phil, he wanted to destroy as many things in the house as possible. The Paul brothers deserved it.

“Also,” added Phil as he tentatively blotted the blood around his nose “It was hardly just one kiss.”

Dan blushed, feeling his body light up at the thoughts of their making out in the forest. Now sober from the fight, he still wanted Phil. He wanted him badly. He wanted him even more knowing Phil would defend him like that.

He still didn’t know what to do with that want.

“It’s weird,” said Dan softly. Phil was now leaning toward the mirror, poking gently at the bridge of his nose and cringing as he assessed the damage. He paused but didn’t move back from the mirror. Instead he watched Dan from it, who now was playing quite curiously with the shell shaped soaps in a bowl on the counter.

“Weird bad or weird good?” asked Phil softly. Dan looked up and met his eyes in the mirror.

“I think good… Do you think, uh, good?” he stuttered. Phil smiled, then cringed as his nose began to ache again.

“Yeah… yeah I do. I, um, I wanted to do that. Before tonight. For a while, actually,” confessed Phil. Dan’s eyes widened and he dropped a shell-soap on the counter.

“Really?” he asked, his voice cracking like he was thirteen again. Phil looked back at the mirror, using his finger to scrape some dried blood off his uninjured cheek.

“I mean yeah, but you’re my friend first. I wasn’t going to push it unless you showed interest,” Phil paused “I still feel bad for forcing myself on you when I was high. I’m really sorry about that.”

“You didn’t force yourself on me,” said Dan quickly “So what was all this about Marzia?” Again, Phil shrugged.

“I thought I liked her too, but when I actually got to know her… all I could think about was you,” Phil said “I would still like to be her friend though, even if she did drug me. She’s sweet, but a little crazy.” Dan scoffed, picked up the soap, and dropped it back in the bowl.

“She is crazy and so is Felix,” he said. There was paused and Phil pulled back from the mirror.

“I don’t think my nose is broken,” he said. Dan nodded, but his eyes were hazy.

“Well that’s good,” he said. There was another loaded pause. Phil turned to Dan.

“How do you suppose I explain this bruise my parents?” he asked. Dan found it weird—why were they talking about this when Phil just admitted he had feelings for him? Looking down at his feet, Dan shrugged.

“I don’t even want to think about that right now. I have no clue how we’re even going to get home! Man, my mom is going to be—”

Suddenly, Dan stopped talking. He paused all movement. Phil crinkled his brow and reached for him.

“What is it?” he asked worried. Dan shook his head.

“No fucking way,” he said loudly. Phil looked down at where Dan was staring but didn’t see anything. His vision was still a bit blurry from being hit and also likely from the hangover that was just over the horizon once he sobered up for good.

“What?!” he asked. Dan leaned down, reached under the lip of the counter, and stood up, revealing, dangling between his fingers, a long silver necklace.

At the bottom of the necklace hung a pendant—a light blue and white cameo of a woman’s head. Phil gasped.

“Are you kidding me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to the last 2 people that commented on my previous chapter. Fun fact, on Wattpad I had this number 1 YA story for a while, and when I would get like 500 comments I'd be like "meh" because it was my original fic. But when I get like 3 comments on my fanfic I'm like "OMFG YAS THANK YOU YOU ANGELS" because I'm kinda more invested in fanfic??? Is that weird??? Anyway, sorry this chapter is short. 
> 
> Oh and if you like my writing, I just started a new multichapter since this one is going to be ending soon(ish). It's called "Not if You Were the Last Guy in the World" and it's Phancest and aliens (not with the aliens, like aliens take over the planet...). So yeah, go check that out if you like my stuff. 
> 
> Thanks for reading xoxoxo


	12. Marzia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dedicate this chapter to my roomie Rebba because she's way too amazing and reads my trash fiction.

“So… should we return it to the Paul’s? Or leave it on the counter?” asked Phil. He grabbed the towel, blotting the last few drops of water and blood off his chin. Dan looked at where he was blotting and noted all the hickeys he had left on his friend’s neck. He had to look away because it was too distracting.

“I think we should take it,” said Dan. Phil laughed.

“Are you crazy? If we run into them again and they see that we have it—”

“What will they do? Punch you?” asked Dan challengingly “No, after all the shit we’ve been through tonight, I’m taking it. Spoil of war.” Phil couldn’t stop laughing now, utterly amused by his best friend’s vengeful streak. Dan cracked a half smile, but held tight to the necklace.

“Besides, it’s very pretty. Here, do you want to wear it under your shirt?” Dan asked. He reached foreword, opening the necklace and placing it around Phil’s neck. They were closer now and Dan could smell the metallic of Phil’s blood. Phil stopped laughing, but smiled and looked at Dan with what only could be described as _a lot_ going on behind his eyes. Dan breathed, the took the pendent of the necklace, tucking it into Phil’s shirt, his fingers brushing against his friend’s warm chest. His hands began to shake when he went to button Phil up, only to discover there weren’t any buttons left. Dan frowned.

“Oh… it looks like I’ll have to wear it then,” said Dan. Phil shrugged .

“The light blue is more like your new style anyway. You can keep it, if you’re trying to be soft,” he said. This time, he pulled the necklace over his head, placing it on Dan. He grabbed the pendant and pulled back the neck of Dan’s shirt. When he went to tuck the pendant in, his knuckle brushed one of the particularly aggressive hickey’s he had left on Dan’s collarbone, and his friend winced. Phil gave a cat-like smirk.

“Looks like I left quite a mark on you there,” he said casually, as if they were talking about a mark from roughhousing and not making out. Dan’s heart was going crazy under his chest. Maybe it was just the literal and metaphorical high of the night, but everything about Phil putting the necklace on him just felt so intimate. He wanted to make out again, right there on the bathroom floor, but felt like it would be pushing his luck if he asked. Besides, Phil’s nose probably still hurt.

“Yeah, um, yeah,” Dan mumbled. Phil took a step back and they just smiled at each other for a moment.

“It’s been quite the night,” said Phil. Dan rolled his eyes.

“You’re telling me.”

* * *

 

The necklace felt like it was burning a hole into Dan’s chest when the reentered the party. Or, rather, when they reentered the mansion which was now chilling out. People moved between individual rooms with glassy eyes, likely getting their final highs of the night or hooking up. They even passed a few people who fell asleep on the floor of the hallway. Still, Dan felt like they had laser vision and could see his stolen necklace under his pastel sweater, which caused him to have to outwardly resist the urge to fiddle with it as the two made their way down the hallway looking for their next destination. The only mission they had in mind was to relocate their friends or secure a safe way home. Dan felt uncertain they’d be able to do either, so his personal mission was to get high again if the opportunity presented itself. Currently, his booze had worn off, but with the total mess of the night’s events, Dan wasn’t ready to be sober, or worse, hungover. He was now fully determined to party until the sun came up.

Looking down at his dying phone, Phil noted that it was almost 5AM. It felt to him that the night had flown by, but at the same time so much had happened. He fought the urge to hold Dan’s hand, to push him up against a wall and make out with him, to pull him off into one of the rooms for more alone time. As the night went on, Phil was having this sinking feeling in his stomach that it all would end. The drugs and alcohol in their systems would dissipate. The recklessness from the night’s events would fade. They’d go back to Dan and Phil—awkward friends who played Mario Kart and never discussed their interest in other boys.

They ended up on the first floor half an hour later, exhausted from all the walking. No music was playing at this point other than a single guitarist who was strumming along by the embers of the fire outside, singing some oldie song. The dancefloor had cleared out, but a few remained in the kitchen snorting coke, from what Phil could tell. Everything felt calm but with the residue of wild. The whole mansion had the air of a deflated party balloon. Louise and PJ were missing in action and Phil had yet to come across anyone sober enough to walk with them home, much less drive. Pulling Dan into the massive laundry room (one of the only unoccupied rooms in the mansion at this point), he leaned back against a washer and sighed.

“Well… I’m stumped. How’re we possibly going to get home?” asked Phil. It took Dan a moment to respond, as his party-addled mind was too focused on the fact that this laundry room presented another opportunity for a make out session before the night was over. Dan shook off the fleeting feeling, trying to think logically for what seemed like the first time that night.

“I suppose we could—”

Dan was cut off by the side door bursting open between them. It was a door that led to the garage, and brought with it a fresh breeze of dewy morning air. Jumping closer together, the two boys whipped around to find none other than Felix standing in the doorway, looking panicked and disheveled. Dan’s jaw dropped in shock.

“Dan? Phil?” asked Felix. The two stared at him, a little dumbfounded, and nodded tentatively “Holy shit—are you guys sober? Please tell me your sober.”

“Eh, well, for the most part. We really shouldn’t drive but… is everything okay?” asked Phil.

“No, it’s not okay, not at all. Marzia just passed out and I don’t know what to do,” he explained in a rush. Eyes widening, Phil backed up a little into the washing machine.  

“What? Was it from those weird drugs she was taking or…” Dan asked, taking the lead as Phil stood by in worry.

“You mean the LSD?” asked Felix. He shook his head manically, as if shaking away cobwebs from his brain “No, we’ve done that loads of times at parties and raves together. I think someone slipped something into her drink an hour or so ago. We were sitting by the fire and she took—God, it was so stupid. She took a red solo cup from some guy and now, she’s passed out in the shed. I don’t know what to do.”

“Is she breathing?” asked Dan.

“I don’t—” began Felix.

“Come on, take us to her. We’ll try to help. Have you called an ambulance?” asked Phil.

Felix looked confused.  

“You haven’t called an ambulance?” asked Dan incredulously. The group was headed out the door at this point, walking across the grass to the back shed. Felix shook his head again., looking down with his eyebrows pulled together.

“No. Should I?” asked Felix. Dan looked at Phil helplessly, and with an almost practiced subtly, Phil took his hand. He squeezed his palm affectionately before letting go.

“Let’s see how she’s doing but… yeah we probably should,” replied Phil, naturally stepping in for Dan who wasn’t sure what to say.

They picked their way across the lawn in the early morning light. It seemed that as the sun came up, a fresh round of partying had infected the teenagers, although this time it was more focus on getting re-fucked up to avoid a hangover. Bass was booming from the pool deck again, with the window panes above letting out steam into the morning air. Inside, Team Ten and at least 40 or so other popular kids were cracking open bottles of vodka and popping molly. A rap song came through the speakers and everyone had changed from their party attire to various swimsuits. Round two was in full swing.

The group of three made it to the shed next to the guest house in the back. The building door was cracked open and the dirt path leading up to it had various footprints, suggesting that there had been quite a bit of traffic that night, most likely to do drugs without having to share. The shed was impeccably nice—nicer than it needed to be, as most of the things in the Paul house had been—and when the boys stepped inside they were greeted with neat racks of gardening tools, a large mower, and a few ATVs toward the back. On the ground, unconscious, was Marzia, her pure white outfit stained with dirt and blue liquor near her collar.

They rushed to her, Phil and Felix dropping to their knees beside her. While Felix shook with panic, Phil remained calm. He leaned down to check her breathing, putting his ear near her lips.

“Okay, well at least she’s breathing,” said Phil. He looked up at Felix, eyebrows knitting together.

“That’s good. Right?” asked Felix. Ignoring him, Phil tapped on Marzia’s shoulder, calling her name. She didn’t respond and when he grabbed her arm, it fell down limply onto the ground.

“I think we should definitely take her to the hospital,” replied Phil. Behind them, Dan stood there chewing his lip nervously.

“Should we call an ambulance?” asked Dan. Phil nodded, but Felix shook his head.

“No! We can’t. I can’t pay for it and—and then her parents will know she was here and we could get arrested and—” Felix spoke quickly, shaking his head and looking panicked. Phil and Dan began talking at once, cutting him off with Dan asking “Would you rather she died?” and Phil, more delicately, saying “Felix, she really needs professional help.” A silence fell over the shed and Felix took a long breath.

“Okay, but do we have any other options? Could we drive her or…?” Felix let the question hang. Dan and Phil looked at each other, an entire conversation going on between their eyes.

“Well no, Dan and I are too messed up for that. I guess we could—I suppose we could try carrying her over. The hospital is only about five minutes away. I don’t know. Dan, what do you think?”

Dan shot at glare at his best friend for putting him on the spot. How the hell was he supposed to know what to do? He was still high and drunk off his ass, just like the others, and that night he had jumped off a roof. He wasn’t exactly in the most responsible mood.

“I mean she’s tiny, but I don’t know if we can carry her that far. Is there anything else we could take like—”

“An ATV?” asked Felix. He had stood up, pacing across the shed, and ended up on the other end. Pulling aside an old sheet, he revealed a shiny, red ATV.

“Felix, I can’t drive a car, I’m not about to drive a damn ATV,” replied Dan. Felix looked down at the vehicle, the crazed look from earlier returning to his eyes. Phil stood and met him across the shed while Dan hovered awkwardly near Marzia.

“I can,” replied Felix “I mean, I can try. We can cut through the woods and—”

“That’s a terrible idea! If you’re too fucked up to drive, there is no way you should be driving that thing either,” replied Phil. Frustrated, Felix grabbed at his hair, kicked the ATV, and paced away from him. Phil gave Dan a wary look, then glanced down at Marzia.

“Then you do it! I’m not calling an ambulance,” replied Felix stubbornly. Letting out a frustrated groan, he slid down the side of the shed and covered his face in his hands. For a moment it was silent. Phil knew it was stupid and irresponsible, but ultimately he was still too drunk to think straight. Hell, he couldn’t even figure out how he was going to get home, much less how he was going to save his ex-crushes’ life.

Dan and Felix looked at Phil like it was his turn to speak since out of the three not only was he the least drunk, but also the most responsible. Phil sighed, putting a hand on the handle of the shiny, brand-new vehicle.

“Fine, but for the record, this is a terrible idea.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning; DO NOT DO THIS AT PARTIES. For all the youngins who read my fiction, it is always a terrible, terrible decision to try to help your friends yourself. My bestie got drugged at a party once and no one in her dorm would call the cops. When I got there, I called the ambulance and they gave her help. She ended up getting a misdemeanor for underage drinking, but TO THIS DAY IS HAPPY I CALLED THE EMERGENCY SERVICES WHEN NO ONE ELSE WOULD. 
> 
> I would like to go on record saying that this fiction is not at all how one can party responsibly. Part of what I've been writing is terrible decisions I would never make at party myself because it's entertaining.
> 
> -Don't accept cups or drugs from strangers, even if it seems okay.   
> -Don't accept rides from people drinking or smoking.   
> -Arrange a ride home before you go out.   
> -Don't attempt dares drunk, particularly dangerous ones.   
> -Always make sure that consent is clear and sober.   
> -Don't go hard your first time partying. Drink responsibly.   
> -If someone is passed out, call an ambulance.   
> -Call a parent or guardian if things get scary. They'd rather you be safe even if they are mad.  
> -Don't get crossfaded.


End file.
